Vulnerable
by Solarissis
Summary: Trent thinks Rachel really made him her familiar. Angry people do crazy things. Rachel/Trent :
1. Chapter 1

ok so this is my first fanfic ever

_ok so this is my first fanfic ever. I love these characters together so i thought about writing a story. But now i guess theres gonna be more to it. This is just my first draft and i dont even have a title yet. Iam working on that and on the next part. I will upload it on and here when finished. The characters to do not belong to me, but to genius Kim Harrison. Anyways i hope you like it and please tell me what you think. : )_

Damn it! Ivy should have come with me, but noooo the vampire said she couldn't, buying groceries is a task she loves to bail out on. Now I get to carry these freaking huge paper bags to my freaking car, which is of course as far away on the parking lot as it can possibly get. This is absurd; I don't know why everybody decides to buy groceries tonight. With a sigh I put the bags down and rearrange them on my arms, making them more comfortable to carry.

The many rows of cars and vehicle soon become a maze, Making it very difficult to get to mines. I blew a stray red curl out of my face and continue to make my way through the cars. I finally spot my lovely little car. Wary, I make my way to it. There's a jaguar parked next to my car, you don't see many of those doing groceries. Ok so now to search for my keys. I put the grocery bags on the pavement and begin searching for my keys in my big leather bag. I can't find them

"Damn it to the turn! I should really consider cleaning out my purse once in a while, Damn it! Damn it! Come one keys where are you." I ramble as I search for my keys. "Looks like tonight is really not my night...Okay patience" I take a deep breath and settle my purse on the hood of my car, a much more comfortable position. Tears are gathering in my eyes. I can't believe not finding my keys is going to make me cry.

"Come one Rachel hold it in" I tell myself . But my tear ducts were really not listening to me.

"Just until you get inside the car. Please" I pleaded to myself in vain. My tears begin to flow freely anyways.

This crying thing has been happening many times in the past month. It seems any little thing sets me off, anything becomes the last straw. I hold it in until I am alone. I can't let Ivy or Jenks or Matalina see me like this. I have to be strong for them. I have to pretend that I am okay, when I really am not. You see in the past years there have been many…difficulties, but somehow everything turns out to okay. But now that's not the case. Everything is not okay. Kisten's death was my downfall. I still can't remember what happened that night. I still can't remember his killer. I miss him so much. His smile, the way his eyes sparkled. And then to realize that I am never going to see him again. To know that I didn't know he was dead, despite being there when he died - until Piscary told me. Amused that I couldn't remember. To know that I fought because my body remembers it but I was much too weak to save him. He died to save me. It tears me apart. And then to add to that Matalina is dieing and soon Jenks will die too. I will do anything to add a few more years to their lifespan.

My breath comes out in shorts gasps. Luckily its dark and the people around fail notice how I am falling apart. Breathe in. Stop. Release. I focus so hard on regulating my breathing that I failed to hear the steps at my back. There was somebody there. I tried to turn around. Too late. A hand with a handkerchief comes up to my nose. The other wraps around my waist. Great. I push at my attacker, trying to fight back but my limbs were already failing me. Who the hell is stupid enough to kidnap me in a public parking lot. In my mind I did a quick elimination process of all my enemies. Most of them who are not stupid enough to do this. My attacker takes his hand away from my nose. But I can't run, and I can't yell, and to my embarrassment I am still crying. He turns me around to face him. Trent.

I look into the face of my attacker. Trent. His green eyes bright with hate, his lips a straight line of anger. His usually well groomed wispy white-blond hair today was running free, easily shifted by the wind. Despite the hate he feels for me I still find him beautiful. Annoying, Arrogant, Selfish, Pain in the ass. But still beautiful. I really can't believe he's doing this. And he's doing it in person. I knew when I last saw him, when I rescued him from the ever-after, we didn't part in the best of terms. Well in no good terms. He tried to strangle me. But I am surprised to see him here personally he usually just sends someone else to so his job.

"What the hell do you think your doing?" I manage to say. My voice was barely a whisper. I clung to the moments of consciousness. His grip on my waist tightened and even though I still manage to stay conscious my control was slipping. My head fell into his warm lean muscular chest. He smells of leaves.

I could hear footsteps approaching us.

"Is everything okay?" said a male voice.

"Yeah, She's fine. She's just…Anemic." His chest vibrates carrying out the sound of his melodic voice. Now i am really delusional. I am going to kill this bastard.

"Do you need any help?" Said the voice

"No that's okay. I got her" Trent opens the passenger door to the jaguar. I should have known there was something weird with that. When I get out of this one I am going to kick myself for not thinking more of it. For not realizing how strange that actually was…He settles me in the passenger seat. His hands come up to my face, and I try to move my head but his hands firm and gentle prevents me from doing so. He wipes away the tears from my eyes. I can see why he's doing this. That man is still there, watching. Then I hear the footsteps fade away, My last chance and to escape from his physco elf is now gone. . He quickly adjusts the seatbelt, so close I can smell him, his elven smell of leaves and of nature. So close I can see the way his thin, childlike, pale hair now falls over his eyes. He use to keep it shorter. As his hands finish with the seatbelt I manage to catch one, so warm despite it being so cold outside. He looks up, His eyes so bright and so close. I try to glare but it seems I can't even do that anymore. My eyes fight to remain open, but that is a battle lost. Trent slides next to me and turns on the engine, the car purrs to life. A knock.

"Trent, What the hell do you think your doing? Trent , Open the door, Right now. This is not the way."

"Quen" I whispered before my mind faded into nothing.

_to be continued..._

_/solarissis_


	2. Chapter 2 Sometimes we are just blind

Coming to my senses my discomfort became apparent. My left arm and hip ached from lying in the same position for god knows how long. Slowly I opened my eyes. The room was dark, only illuminated by the moonlight that bled through the glass doors and window. I was lying on a sofa, the fabric soft beneath my cheek. I was completely disoriented, no idea where I was. I closed my eyes again and kept them closed for some seconds. When I opened them again nothing had change. But the room became much more familiar. A hell of a lot more familiar. I recognized the desk; I recognized the office even if it was dark. And the wild garden that the glass doors led to. But most importantly I recognized the man sitting behind the desk. Trent. As soon as I did last night came rushing back. Was it last night, or this same night? I am going to kill this bastard, no killing will be too easy of a punishment, I am going to have Jenks pix his ass, oh and not only his ass but a very embarrassing place to scratch.

Trent was sitting behind his desk like a statue. Or like a king. Or maybe like the murdering son of an elf he is. He sat unmoving except that barely visible rise and fall of his chest. His hair and his eyes looked silver in the moonlight. After a second of studying I remembered that I should be mad. But I wasn't mad yet. No really. I was annoyed that he would have the balls to kidnap me but I wasn't mad. Not yet anyways, I wonder how long I can keep my cool. I looked at Trent again, and I met his eyes. Oh hell, his eyes were burning with rage; if he had laser vision then I would not have been standing here. Okay maybe rage doesn't begin to cover it. His eyes burned with hate, with an intensity that made me want to cringe. Okay I admit it; he looked scary, but He totally doesn't need to know that.

I sat up slowly and soon stood up. I stretched my body, I Wasn't mad yet but hell I do love annoying the elf. "Lights on 93" Is the only thing he says. The room becomes brighter. He continues staring at me with that uncomforting glare of his. The silence grows until it feels like the only noise is coming from the wind outside. I changed my mind about annoying him; something tells me I should leave it for another day. Today it seems that Trent is a time bomb, and I definitely don't want to be here when he explodes. Don't get me wrong, I am curious of his decision to kidnap me personally, but for some reason I feel that that conversation can wait a day or two.

"Well Trent, it was nice of you to...escort me here, and let me sleep in your sofa...but I probably have to head home." I make my way towards the door and he says nothing. I can feel his eyes making giant holes on the back of my head. I open the door and come face to face with my favorite of his entourage; Jonathan. That tall ass freak of nature.

"Hi." I try to make my way around him but he positions himself so that his tall-ass body blocks the door.

"Are you done with her Sa'ham?" He looks over me to Trent. And then he looks back at me. He looks at me like I am an insect that he can't wait to squash. Oh the joy.

"No." I hear Trent say from behind me. His voice barely above a whisper manages to be heard. I turn to look at him. Okay I give up, I am definitely going to tackle the time bomb.

"What the hell is this all about?"

"We need to talk."

"Well you could've called like a normal person."

"You wouldn't have come." Surprisingly he still hadn't moved. Bad, very very bad.

"Hell no…You must be delusional if you think that I would come willingly to you after you tried to _strangle_ me. You know I think that maybe, okay not maybe; you are a psychotic maniac, and you should be taken to the psychiatric ward." I smiled sweetly after I said that, eyelashes fluttering and everything.

"Do _not_ toy with me, Rachel." I have to get my ass out of here before the guy kills me. "Sit down, make yourself comfortable. You are not going anywhere." I look back at Jonathan, maybe he can let me go. Yeah right. It really looks like I am not going anywhere anytime soon. I walk towards Trent and stand across from him. Jonathan closes the door. But I am not fooled, I am betting the last 37 bucks in my purse that the freak is still there.

"Why don't you tell me what the hell this is about so I can go home and What time Is it anyways?" I run my hand through my hair, which probably looks like crap.

"3:17."

"Thanks, but why am I here?" Now who's playing games? I was getting angry. He has absolutely no right to drag me here. And I hate the way he looks at me like I'm mentally incompetent. "Trent if you are not willing to talk, how are we going to solve this?"

"Familiar" His voice a whisper. His eyes narrow.

"What?"

"I am your familiar." He said this time louder.

"You are not my familiar. I only said that to get you out of the ever-after." This is ridiculous. "Can I go home now?" This is frustrating. I run my hair through my frizzy red hair. I really don't want to think about how it looks right now. Thinking about my hair I can't help but to glance down at myself. I don't have my coat on, I look around the room and spot it on the couch I was laying on. My red button up couldn't possibly have any more wrinkles. At least the jeans looked decent.

He walked around his desk and stood in front of me. This close he became even more overwhelming. His eyes were not the only things that expressed anger. His body is tense, ready to strike out any moment. His sleeves are pushed back and I can see in his forearms the effort it's costing him to keep his anger in check. My eyes wander back to 

his face. Looking at him he makes me want to look down and say sorry, like a kid caught stealing candy. I refuse to show him how he's affecting me right now.

"I've been feeling it, Rachel. I feel _you_ pull at me every time you do a spell." He's saying this through clench teeth.

"Trent I don't know what you're talking about, I told you I only said that to get you out of the ever-after. I never really made you my familiar; Get it through that thick head of yours."

Now that I think of it casting black spells have hurt a lot less lately. Damn it back to the turn, how the hell did this happen? Months ago I rescued his ass from the ever-after but that was it. I never bound him to me; I never made him my familiar. I wouldn't do that to a person, not after I accidentally did it to Nick and the guy couldn't take it. I had decided to bear the pain myself, or at least me and Mr. Fish but never another person.

"I want you to fix this. I will not be familiar to anyone or anything."

"Look Trent I am not lying, I never made you my familiar. I am not saying you are lying, I am not saying that you didn't feel what you felt but I _never_ casted the spell to bind you to me. I don't know why it would happen." Sighing I took a step back from him. I could feel the chair behind me. I am not backing down; it's just that he's a little too close for comfort. "I'll look into it; I'll ask Al" at that his eyes narrowed "and if you really are my familiar I am going to change that." The look in his face said that he thought otherwise. Sometimes it's a wonder I don't smack him in the side of his head for being such a dumb ass. This guy really knows how to push my buttons. It seems that one day we are going to end up killing each other. Well lets make it tonight and what the hell might as well go down with a fight. "What the hell do you want from me?"

"I should've killed you a long time ago. If I would've known you were demon-kin, I would've done so a very long time ago." Buttons, Buttons, Buttons.

"Here we go again with the demon-kin crap. First of all I am not _demon-kin_, I am a witch damn it, and a good one too."

Suddenly he pushes me back and I fall into the chair that was in back of me. A second later he's leaning into me, each of his hand on the arms of the chair, his face close enough to kiss. Bad girl, no thinking of kissing the very bad elf. His breath is warm caressed my face.

"You can bear their children. You can make more of" He curled his lips at the last word, If he would've been a werewolf I would have been in grave danger. "them." He was very _very _close to doing something drastic. I could tap into the lay line to push him off, but that certainly wouldn't help the situation. So I am going to do this the ol' human way. I am going to see if I could talk some sense into that thick head of his.

"I know." I closed my eyes, this was going to be difficult. I knew that I could have demon children. I didn't need a reminder. This was something I cried over. I could give birth to demon children, which haven't been born in thousands of years. That had put a hell of a glitch in my future family plans. Meaning no children for me. I opened my eyes; his face had softened a bit. His eyes didn't look as angry.

"Why do you hate me so much? I know I've been a pain in the ass, I've put you in jail on your wedding day, we've never been the best of friends but I've never hated you. Despite everything you've done to me, trapping me as a mink, and putting me to fight with rats, despite trying to kill me too many times, I don't hate you. Sure you annoy the hell out of me, but that's a different story. I can't even think about killing you, or even leaving you in the ever-after. What have I done to you that makes you hate me so much."

"Your soul is tainted." He then released the chair and moved away from me. Pacing back a forth running his fingers through his wispy pale hair.

"My soul _is_ tainted. But every stain, every demon mark I have worn was to save my friends. And I wouldn't change that Trent. I am a good person, I am a good witch, damn it. Everything I've done is for those I love. And I don't think you can ever understand that. Have you ever even had any real friends? People you would do anything to keep safe? And I don't mean killing other people, I mean people you would give _your_ life to keep safe?" I've never seen Trent this agitated before. If the guy kept pacing as he was, he was going to wear a hole on the floor, not that I care but it would probably clash with the deco. I remained seated in the chair watching him wearily. "And…And you shouldn't be talking about tainted souls. You can see my stains, but even though you can't see the stains on your soul you carry a lot more than I do you murdering bastard. It's a wonder you can even sleep."

The next thing that happened was so sudden I did not have time to react. I was still seated and for a second I thought he was going to knock me out or tackle me or something. But what he did was the beginning of a breaking down. He walked past me in a motion so smooth and quickly I barely had time to register what was going on. But for all his crimes he didn't hit _me_. Nope, he took it out on the wall. Oh yeah the wall. He punched the wall many times repeatedly before I actually moved. I was staring with my eyes opened wide and my mouth hanging open, and then I got control over myself.

"Everything I have done, I've done for the" punch "for the survival of" punch "my people," punch "I have sacrificed" punch "everything" punch.

"Trent! Trent! What- Trent!" I got up then rushing towards him. "Jon!" I couldn't believe this. At this moment I couldn't see all the bad that he had done. I just saw a man falling apart. I realized for the first time what he had done for his people. I realized that he had given everything he could to make sure that elves did not become extinct; his happiness, his resources, but above everything he had given his soul. He had also had tainted it for someone else. We were much alike, he and I. More than I would ever care to admit aloud.

Jon was in there in a blink of an eye. I could tell he was also shocked by what he was seeing, the freak just stood there staring.

I didn't know what to do. I had never experienced such a breakdown from Trent before, hell not even close. Hesitantly, I put my hand on his shoulder; he flinched under my touch, but afterwards I could tell that the worst was over. He leaned his forehead and opened palms against the wall, like the wall was the only support. He looked like a man losing a war. I really didn't know what to do. I could see now that his knuckles were bloodied and already beginning to bruise. I just hope they weren't broken. I looked up to see Jonathan looking down at Trent with a concerned look of his face.

"Sa'ham?" Trent didn't answer. Jonathan didn't move. I know why. I looked at Trent and it seemed like anything could set him off again. I doubt Jonathan had ever seen this side of his Sa'ham before.

"Trent?" He didn't respond at my calling either. But I guess it was up to the only woman in the room to deal with this. "Okay, Jonathan why don't you get some bandages or…a first aid kit or…Quen." He shot me an evil glare. "Come on, you obviously dunno what to do."

Jonathan actually left.

"Trent?" He still hadn't changed, his shoulders were slumped with defeat and his forehead still against the wall. But then again he just broke down. "You're bleeding, Well then again you probably noticed that." I whispered the last part more to myself than him. I put my hand on his shoulder again. "Trent?"

"I have tried so hard." His voice whisper that if I was a few steps away I would have missed it. He put a hand over my hand which was still on his shoulder. He held on to it for some seconds, like I was the last piece of wood floating in the ocean. Then he let go. And with that he said "Leave."

"You-"

"Leave. Please." I didn't really want to leave. Despite everything he'd done, It felt too much like abandoning, something I am definitely not good at. But there was nothing I could do. We all have our crosses to bear.

Hesitantly I made my way to the door. There was no Jonathan to stop me now. "I am sorry." I said before I walked out the door. I didn't know what else to say.

Laying on my bed that night, I couldn't sleep. My body felt exhausted but my mind just refused to lose conscious. Trent's breakdown was too strongly imprinted in my head. In my mind I kept seeing him breakdown over and over again. I couldn't stop thinking about that, about him. I couldn't help but to analyze him more. To think of life from his point of view. To think of everything he's done from his point of view. And I hate to admit it but I can see some reasoning behind the murdering he's committed. I think about how frustrating it is for him to try to save his race, when there's little hope. He's sacrificed himself and others for his people. I would kill myself before admitting aloud that maybe Trent and I are more alike than I would like, that maybe I _do_ understand him.

As usual one thought leads to another. And soon I am remembering everything I know about Trent; the business man, the murderer, the drug lord but above all the man. From the anguish in his face when Quen almost died a few months back, to him telling me that the man I thought was my father never was. Trapping me as a mink, to his warm arms carrying me when I we almost drowned. Now because I was seeing everything he was and everything he is, I am more confused than ever. I don't hate him, I never did. I always saw the actions and never the person or the man but my heart sees him now as a kin-spirit. Everything we've done, we've done to save those we love; he his race and me my friends. I see now that perhaps he's not so bad. Not so bad at all.

_To be continued…_


	3. Chapter 3 Primal Instict

I have to say that sometimes the people I love just set me in murderous moods; Like Ivy for example. I knew that as soon as I saw the invitation to Ryan Cormel annual charity ball, that I was going to be dragged into that one. And wrong I was not. I was totally not up to playing nice with rich folks, I have better things to do. Or just dressing up for that matter. So ivy convinced me that it would be a good idea if we attended together, Ryan was probably going to be busy and I could make her company. Despite being hesitant I accepted. That was before the woman showed me the dress requirements; Gowns of course, and how very thoughtful of her to get one for me. I guess she too is convinced that I need help dressing myself.

SO here I was sitting at a table at a beautifully decorated hotel ballroom, sipping wine, in a beautifully made blue designer gown with carefully curled hair and applied makeup. This ballroom was the highest room in the hotel had glass ceilings which your were able to see the sky. It was decorated in gold and white, so majestic and beautiful that it'll probably make Louis XIV jealous. Many guests were dancing on the dance floor to the soft music. The only problem today was that I was now alone. Ivy decided to bail on me as soon as Ryan was no longer busy. And my other problem includes this dress. Yes it was beautiful but I was terrified of it. The dress was long and fitted at the hips, with a back and front cut way too low, and I couldn't find double sided tape. I am afraid that if the wind so much as blows in the wrong direction I was going to be flashing the ballroom.

I was just here contemplating how my night could possibly get worse when I spotted Trent across the room. He was sitting between Jon and a pretty blonde that I've never seen before. He was dressed up for the night all right, looking very good. His black tuxedo impeccable and his hair carefully combed. As if feeling my eyes on him, he turned his head and looked directly at me. He raised his drink in the tradition of a toast; - towards me, and smiled. At that moment I decided that it was probably a good idea to call it a night. He was already acting weird.

Carefully I got up, and made my was to the restroom, damning this dress every step of the way. While I was washing my hands; the blonde who was with Trent walked in. She pulled a lipstick from her bag, and then instead of applying it she turned to me. I sure as hell didn't like the look on her face. She looked at me like she was way above me. Great, just what I needed.

"So you're Rachel Morgan?"

"Uh-huh." I was going to keep this as short as possible. I turned off the faucet went for some paper towels and started to walk away.

"Trent's with me so I recommend you keep away."

"Right." I didn't even bother to turn around as I said that and left the room.

Down the hall Trent was waiting, I guess for his date. I had to get past him to get out of here so I started walking past him when he spoke.

"Hi."

"Hi"

"Can we talk?" I walked back a few steps to be closer to him. The party, I guess, was raving inside and the music was getting a bit loud.

"I talked to Al. And he did it. He made you my familiar." Al thought it would be amusing to see the elf as my familiar. It was I guess sort of ironic since he tried to strangle me. You have to give it up to Al; the comedian. "And I fixed-"Just then the Blonde came and stood next to Trent, her arm around his. He had this strangled look on his face. I couldn't help but to smile. "Don't worry about it. I changed that."

"I know…Thanks"

"You changed what?" Oh good god, she's one of those.

"Nothing." I smiled my sweetest smile at her and then started to walk away.

"Rachel can we talk in private?" I turn around in time to see him disentangle himself from Blonde.

He walked towards me. "I am sorry Heather; I just need to talk to Rachel." He looked back at her, but the look in his face said he wasn't sorry at all, but relieved. Her face was red as hell.

"Bad date?" I said trying to irritate him. Old habits die hard.

"Very." He said not catching my bait.

"So what do you want to talk about?"

"Nothing. Just help me get away from her."

"What?" –that's way too sweet.

"She's irritating, she's possessive, and she _gropes_ me-"

"I don't want to know."

"Rachel-"

"Hell no. Solve it yourself elf-boy…Besides you'll probably try to strangle me as soon as there's no one around."

"What do you have to loose?" Ignoring my previous comment he looked at me for some seconds and then smiled a pretty honest smile. My mouth dropped open. I think this was the first time I ever saw Trent smile like he was actually happy, like he finally found something he was looking for. I was not falling for that sweet smile; he probably wanted something from me. But I couldn't help but to smile back.

"What do _I_ have to gain?" He then gave me one of his trademark scowl.

"Okay, okay." I wrapped my arm around his and look back at Heather. The look on her face said that if she ever caught me sleeping, she was going to strangle me, or better yet burn me alive. And I started walking with Trent, the lesser evil (yeah right) towards the elevator.

"So where're we going?" I ask Trent.

"_I_ am going to find some peace and quiet."

"Good luck with that."

I walked with my arm around Trent's until we were on the elevator. The elevator doors closed and the last thing I saw was Heather just standing there. I kind of felt bad for the girl obviously being avoided by her date.

I pressed the lobby while Trent pressed 6th, a long way down from the 20th but still not leaving. After that I stood on one side and Trent on the other. The silence stretched on until it grew awkward. I kept staring at our reflections on the Shiny metal doors.

"So, Heather and you-"

"None of your business."

"Hey I just saved you from a night of groping, be grateful."

"I already thanked you."

"No you didn't."

"I did."

"Uh-huh"

"You're being childish." He had a smile on his lips as he said this. And his eyes twinkled with amusement.

"And you're being ungrateful." I didn't like that smile. It scared me. He smiles like a school boy with a crush, or maybe a physco with a knife. Take your pick, I pick the latter one.

At that very moment He stooped the elevator. I just looked at him. What the hell, great now I was going to get murdered in an elevator and nobody was ever going to catch my captor. I am a total dumbass, how could I possibly get into an-

"Rachel…about the other…night…I…well…" He runs his hair through his carefully combed hair, making it look free and wild. His face is serious again, his eyes no longer held amusement, but infinite sadness and wisdom. "I was just …and..well…I am sorry for…abducting you."

"Wow you're actually apologizing; I never thought you were into apologizing." I said. I should have probably just nodded and accepted his apology. Way to go Rachel.

"At least I am apologizing unlike other people." 'other people' clearly meant me.

"What should I apologize for? Arresting you for the people you've killed? I think that was well deserved. So don't expect an apology." I said pressed the stop button again, causing the elevator to continue.

"I am trying to make amends-"

"Well you can shove those amends right-" I was now in his face.

"You are the most infuriating woman I've ever met!" His eyes burned bright with anger and frustration, I seriously thought he was going to stomp his foot next. That's a hell of a silly thought, Trent stomping like a kid.

"Yeah Yeah, whatever you say." I moved out of his face and put some distance between us.

"So where are you going?" I edged towards a topic change.

He sighed but answered my question. I guess he got my push towards the no-so-subtle topic change, and I guess he really was trying to make amends. Or get on my good side to then try to make me work for him. Ha. "I rented a room for tonight."

I really couldn't let this one pass by. What can I say being around Jenks takes a toll.

"To wait for Cormel?" I couldn't help but to look directly at him while I said this. Raising an eyebrow and smiling wickedly.

As he realized what I had said his face turned crimson. But in just a few seconds he gained control over himself, leaving only an adorable faint flush on his cheeks. He then glared at me.

The door opened then on the 6th floor. The Hallway looked pretty empty but then again it was about 2 in the morning and the guests who weren't partying were probably sleeping.

"Goodnight" Trent said as he walked out the elevator.

"'Night. Ya'll have a great time. Don't make too much noise." I said as the doors began to close. But they didn't close. Before they did Trent put his hand in which caused the door to open again and then pulled me out.

"What-"

What he did froze me; I was completely caught off guard with this one. Never in a million years would've I expected Trent to do that. He wrapped one arm around my waist and the other went on the back of my head and my hair. He then closed the very little space between us, every line of my body against his. My dressed protected me very little from the delicious warmth radiating from his skin. I was breathing his earthy scent. He had invaded all my senses. He looked at me in the eyes. His eyes full of anger and wonder and something else, something…strange. I never realize how many emotions eyes can hold at once. He then kissed me. His warm soft lips against mines were urgent and hungry. But before I could even react he let me go. I stood there completely stunned. I looked at him and then at the elevator at my back. I regained my breath but apparently my head was not yet here. Because the next words I said were, well, incoherent.

"The…doors… closed." Obviously the elevator left. I mean, what it was going to wait for me while Trent did some stupid shit.

What got me coherent and very angry was the smile that appeared on Trent's lips. A smile that reminded me a lot of the big bad wolf. At that I stepped close to him and did something that I wanted to do for a very long time. I slapped him okay maybe it wasn't a slap. I punched him on his jaw, very hard. My knuckles were throbbing afterwards. He was on me before I could react, pushing me against the wall, pinning my hands above me. His lips held the same hunger and intensity as before.

At first I fought back, tried to push him away. But soon the battle had definitely changed. My lips didn't yield for him. Nope, I kissed him back with the same intensity and he was kissing me. He let go of my hands and grabbed my thighs, pushing himself even closer against me. My legs wrapped around his waist, my fingers grabbed his hair. One of his hands stayed at my thigh and the other moved up to my back, both holding on with bruising strength. The kisses between us had turned into something far from gentle and sweet, more like carnal, instinctive and primal.

There was a voice in the back of my head demanding that I stopped this right now. We were in a hallway and that there were cameras. But it was very weak, like the wind, just a whisper. I did catch the camera part and at that I pulled Trent from my lips for enough time to say "cameras." That was the magic word.

If you think it made us stop, you are wrong. We managed to get to the room between kisses and pushes. He opened the door somehow and we were inside what seemed like the parlor. We weren't watching were we were going, my back hit the wall again, this time there was sharp pain as my shoulder hit an object I am guessing a lamp or something. I have no idea what.

My hands started working at taking off Trent's blazer, his tie, his shirt. He somehow slipped out of his shoes, at that I realize that mines were no longer on. My hands worked on unbuttoning his pants while his worked at taking off my dress. He slipped out of his pants, his socks and underwear went along with them. He tried to get me out of my dress but somehow couldn't find the right way to do it. For a second he stopped and looked at it and then just slipped it out of my head.

At that second I couldn't help but to notice how beautiful he was. His hair was tousled and his jaw was already bruising, but he was just stunning. His body was lean and muscular. Lightly golden. He looked like he belong in a painting, or in another world altogether. And of course he did.

After that the kisses didn't stop, he trailed down my neck, my collar bone. His skin hot against mines. We barely made it to the bed, crashing unidentified objects along the way.

We lost ourselves in our skin, in our pleasure; bruising ourselves along the way. We were one.

_To be continued…._


	4. Chapter 4 Strange Feelings

_So this is now really the next chapter, but I thought I would be fun to write a small something from the point of view of Trent. I thought it would be interesting to see what was going on inside his head. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks a ton for the reviews. Please keep on writing more. I love to know what you guys think. : )_

I laid there arms behind my head staring at the ceiling. Thinking. There was so much to think about. I was so very confused. Confused about everything I was feeling. About what happened tonight. I don't know what overcame me when I pulled Rachel out of that elevator and kissed her. All I know is that I felt the urge to press my lips against her. To hold her against me. I've never felt that urge with another person before. And for once I did exactly what I was feeling.

Our relationship always consisted of either your with me, or your against me. She has annoyed me to no end. And recently I really thought I hated her, or rather what she was. I was afraid of her, so I hated her. But I am not so sure anymore. Not so sure at all.

I turn my head and see that she's sleeping next to me. Her bare back shows the proof of our wild night. She has a bruise forming on her left shoulder, and some on her thigh and her lower back. I didn't escape completely unscathed either; my back has rows scratches. And thinking about our night together I can't help but smile. It was rather…exhilarating.

I turn slightly and lean on my elbow to get a better view of her. Laying there she looks so harmless. Her skin pale, her red curls wild around her face. From her lips, escape a small sigh. And that reminds me of her a couple of hours ago underneath me. I had never felt such passion before. And that calls a feeling inside of me, one I've never felt. One that scares me. I have a tendency to destroy or to own what scares me.

Perhaps I should kill her now. She's sleeping and unarmed. I'll probably never get this easy of an opportunity. I lean forward but instead of ending her life, I brush a few curls out of her face, then slowly with the my fingers I trace the bruises along her back causing goose bumps along the way. A small shudder escapes her body and she curls up searching for some warmth. I pull the sheets up covering her body and pull her to me, my arms wrapped around her waist, my chest to her back. I buried my face on the hallow of her neck. Wrapped around her I soon drift up to sleep.

My last conscious thought was 'What's have I done?'.


	5. Chapter 5 Currents

_Hi guys, I am back. This is Chapter 5. The characters belong of course to the brilliant Kim Harrison. Thank you so very much for all your reviews. I appreciate it a ton! _

_So I was on the train the other day and was totally bored on an extremely long ride. So I started browsing through my ipod and looking at songs that went with my Rachel and Trent storyline. I got some kick ass songs so at the end of the chapter I wrote the songs that go with it. Thanks for reading : )_

There was warmth wrapped around me and a scent of leaves in the air. The warmth felt extremely good and the smell was delightful. I was laying on my back in a very comfortable bed, there was a light weight around my waist. I opened my eyes. I took in my surroundings, Trent laying facedown next to me completely nude, his body as perfect as a statue. His arm draped over my stomach, his face inches from mines. I could see some scratches on his back and instantly I knew that my nails had been the weapon.

I was always curious as to what laid beneath Trent's conservative suits; always pictured him in maybe a swimming trunk or less. But the real thing was way beyond me. His body was lean like an athlete, every muscle, every sinew so well defined he could've been carved out by Michelangelo himself. I studied him sleeping, his face peaceful in deep sleep. I have to admit he was beautiful, as beautiful as a fallen angel should be.

Looking at him was such a distraction that it took me some time to look away and to recap on what had happened just a few hours ago. It took me some damn time to even realize that I had slept with Trent. Yeah I could see him laying next to me all glorious in his nudity, but Crap on Toast, I really slept with him. I have no idea why I would sleep with him I sure as hell wasn't thinking, I give you that much. I mean Trent of all people, this guy who I have seen murdering, and who put my dumb ass to fight in the underground world of rat fights (Yeah doesn't sound scary, but try being trapped as a mink and having to battle killer rats till death, not easy let me tell you, not easy at all). Good god, my hormones must have gotten the better of me.

But now that my hormones were sated I realized how much more I complicated my already complicated life was about to be. Somehow Trent sensed that I was awake and soon his green eyes opened. His eyes were a color that I've never seen before him. Not one hint of blue in those greens.

"Morning". His voice was a whisper and rough from sleep.

"Morning." I repeated. I didn't know what else to say. He stared into my eyes as if trying to uncover every thought that has ever run through my head. The intensity in his stare made me look away.

"I…Can I use your shower?" I felt like I needed to escape from last night and from him. Don't get me wrong. Last night was great. But I think it shouldn't have happened. He hates me. I don't know what overcame him yesterday, or what overcame _me_ but it's really clear today in my head that he hates me and probably always will.

"Yes." My hands reached for his arm on my stomach but before I could remove his arm he tightened it around me, closing whatever little distance there was between us.

"Stay?" He said and kissed my lips.

He acted like he actually wanted me around him. A little voice inside my head was saying that maybe he didn't hate me at all, that maybe this was the beginning of something but the stronger voice said that he probably wants me to do something for him. Something that would risk my life. Perhaps he was using me. He's used so many people before, all to his advantage.

"No, I can't…I have to go. Ivy and Jenks are probably wondering where I am." I said as I stood up, and took the blanket with me. He's seen me naked, but I am definitely going to try to keep that from repeating. We might have had kick ass sex, but I am going to avoid sleeping with him a second time.

I wrap the blanket around me, and left the room. I found my dress soon after on the parlor. It was on the floor, like a forgotten pile of silk. That wasn't the only thing on the floor. Trent's clothes were all over the room. There was a lamp broken on the floor, and some other decorations that were now only broken glass. Crap on toast we trashed the place.

Carefully I made my way to the bathroom. I relieved myself, brush my teeth and then took a long shower. I scrubbed myself raw, trying to rid myself of Trent's scent. When I felt satisfied I got out of the shower , dried myself and put the dress back on.

I sat on the toilet seat. I really didn't want to face Trent at the moment or the world for that matter. I was going to try to keep this hidden from Ivy and Jenks but if they found out, well let's just say things weren't going to get very pretty. I paced back and forth across the large bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror. I was glowing; I smiled at myself and then quickly tried to wipe the smile from my face and mind. As fun as last night was it definitely shouldn't happen again. Ever.

When I emerged from the bathroom Trent was sitting on the sofa, with my shoes in his hands. Thankfully he had put on some pants. He was still a distraction but for the most I could focus on getting out of here.

"That was a very long shower. I was beginning to think you left." He smiled then. A breathtaking smile.

"I _am_ leaving but with my shoes." I walked over to where he was sitting and when to grab the shoes out of his hands. But he wouldn't let them go.

"They are very pretty aren't they? I can leave lend them to you if your into cross dressing."

"Room service brought them in earlier this morning; Seems like you left them in the hallway yesterday." He had this cocky look on his face that I just felt like wiping off.

"I was distracted."

"Obviously."

"I am leaving now." I took the shoes from his hands and slipped them on my feet.

"So you said." HE grabbed my wrist and pulled me to him. I put my knee between his knees, to stop myself from falling completely on him.

"Damn you elf." My face was just inches from his. Teasing him. Two can play this game. Maybe he was trying to use me. Maybe he wasn't. But if he was I sure as hell can use him too. I don't know for what but I'll think about it.

"Witch." He leaned in and kissed me, just a brush of his lips against mines. As light as a butterflies touch. He leaned in for a second kiss pulling my lower lip between his. I was not going to succumb. I managed to step away from him and walked towards the door. I walked out without looking back. He was too much of a temptation to look back.

I made my way outside to the parking lot. I found my car and made my way home. Thinking about Trent the whole way. What a tangled web we weave.

****

I opened the door to my church to be greeted by loud pixie kids playing with Rex, the cat. I could hear one of Jenks kids yell "Ms. Morgan's home!" Thanks to everything holy Jenks came into view and ordered his kids back to the drawer. The small pixie made a fierce dad.

"Rache' where have you been?" He said flying into my view. As he got closer I could see his little nose wrinkle. "And why do you smell like Trent?"

"Um…-" Crap I should have realized that the dress still smelled like Trent. I was going to have to get it dry cleaned as soon as possible. Like right now.

"Rachel, what happened?" His little face was pinched with worry.

"Well…I…Um…-"

That was enough to say. He realized what had happed.

"Tink's titties Rache, you and the _elf_?" That got him on a roll. He wasn't angry , oh no, he was laughing too hard to be angry.

I went to the kitchen and started making coffee. I sat on a stool while the coffee got ready. Jenks was soon there. I would not be able to escape his teasing and his comments for a long time.

"Was he hard?" When it came to sexual comments Jenks knew no limits.

"Jenks!" I could feel my face turning red.

"Aw, come on Rache! Give me some details. How did you get him hot and bothered, I personally thought nobody could do that." At that he released another laugh.

I went and grabbed my mug of coffee and buried my face in it. I was not about to discuss last night with Jenks, that would give him reason to tease me for the rest of my life.

"One thing is for sure Rache" He said between his laughter "Ivy will castrate him if she found out."

I could hear the truth in his words. " I know." Now I was scared for Trent of all people. "Where is she, by the way?"

"She hasn't returned yet. I guess your not the only one that got lucky last night."

"Jenks…You can't tell her, she'll-"

"I know. But Tink's dildo, Rache, Trent? Damn. Maybe he'll stop trying to kill you now that he's getting some. "

I got finished my coffee and made my to my room. Jenks was still laughing.

****

Thanksgiving this year seemed to be perfect. No flaw to this day. The leaves were orange and still falling from the trees. And the weather was cold, but the cold made it all the more incredible to be warm among friends and family. We were al gathered at Keasley's house. When I said all I meant all. Ceri, Keasley, Jenks and his complete family, Ivy, Mom, Takata, even Marshall, who had been invited by my mom, the matchmaker. The vibe in the air was just refreshing. There were no grudges, no lies, just everybody having a nice time. I was helping Ceri prepare the dinner for tonight. We'll she was preparing dinner, I was more like watching and passing her things. Keasley and the rest were sitting out on the back porch making jokes, their laughter loud and contagious. It was a great day in all. What thanksgiving should be like, among family and friends.

The doorbell rang; I could hear Quen's voice greeting everybody. I could hear other voices too.

"Rachel can I leave you for a second." I look up to see her with a glowing face. Her stomach was huge now, she was due anytime soon.

"Sure." I grabbed an apple from the fridge and went to on one of the tall stools that surrounded the counter. Elbows leaning on the small square table. I took a bit of the apple.

Marshall walked in with a smile on his face. I remember meeting him on that crazy run. The nice hairless swimmer that got us across to the were's territories. Well he was hairless then, now his hair had grown back. He was very handsome and extremely nice. And a witch.

"Want some help?" He on the counter across from me.

I smiled at him. "Well,- not really, Ceri's doing all the work, I am just kinda watching and handing her things."

He laughed. His laughter was like a soft thunder. But it didn't remind me of the rain. It just reminded me of nature and safety. "So… I was wondering, if maybe you'd like to do something next week?"

"What do you have in mind?"

"Maybe a movie, or- you know what? Maybe the zoo...Or maybe we can do both." He looked like he was getting a bit tied tongue. Marshall was a very nice guy. There was absolutely nothing wrong with him. And he did have a face that was good for the eyes, and not to mention that killer swimmer's body. But he didn't have that dangerous streak that I was so gravely attracted to.

"Yeah, I think they both sound good." I smiled at him.

Just then Quen walked in the kitchen holding hands with Ceri. They looked so incredibly happy together.

"Quen you're here!" There was a person behind them, well behind Quen really. I couldn't see who it was.

"Yup, wouldn't miss it-" Quen moved a bit and exposed the person behind him. Trent. "-For the world."

I couldn't believe he brought Trent along. This was going to be a hell of an awkward situation. It has been about two weeks since we slept together. He didn't call me or anything like that but there were some roses sent at my church. The card said "And kisses are a better fate than wisdom." Pretty cryptic, but the only person I've…kissed lately is Trent so I am pretty sure they were from him. So basically I've been avoiding him like a plague.

Trent walked into the kitchen like he didn't know why he had come. And I couldn't agree more. I mean I knew that the guy barely had family but come on, he didn't need them. Or at least he acted like he didn't need them. But as soon as his eyes fell on Marshall all that changed, his relaxed business man persona slipped in. If I didn't know him any better I'd say he was at ease. But I knew better, I could read the small tightness in his eyes and lips.

And I guess that when my eyes fell upon Trent I froze. Quen misinterpreted me and thought that perhaps I was scared of what Trent was going to do.

"He's going to behave today." Quen said. I smiled, at the knowledge that only Trent, Jenks and I knew. The smile seemed to reassure Quen somehow. "Hi." That was directed towards Marshall.

"Oh sorry. Quen this is Marshall, Marshall- Quen and Trent." Marshall and Quen shook hands. Marshall and Trent did _not _shake hands. Trent just said a quiet "Hello" to Marshall.

He looked at me and our eyes locked. A slow and wicked smile spread across his lips. I contained the smile that was going to spread over my lips and raised my eyebrow at him instead. There was amusement glistening in his eyes and the tightness was no longer there. It seemed like now he knew why he had come. I knew too; to annoy me. Well what the hell. Let's see who annoys who.

Our secret exchange didn't go unnoticed. Maybe we were staring at one another for longer than we thought. I think I heard Quen clear his throat. I returned to my forgotten apple and took another bite.

Ceri moved back towards her cooking, putting seasoning here and there, adding the last touches to the dinner. Quen surprisingly started to help her. They looked so happy together, their eyes shined when they met. I have to say that I envy them. I don't think I could ever fall in love so deeply. And looking at them now makes me grief inside because I feel that I could never have that.

The sound of a stool slide across the floor jerked me from my thoughts. I looked up to see Trent sitting next to me. His elbows on the table and his chin in his palms.

"So what do you think about next Friday?" Marshall's voice reminded me that he was there right in front of me. With all the commotion inside my head I forgot he was there. I knew he was there but I wasn't thinking about him.

"Yeah, sure- we can meet at my place and then go."

"Okay then it's a date." I cringed inside at the word date with Trent right next to me. I felt him, more than saw him shift a little on his stool. "I am going to go listen to some of your mom's stories." With that he left the kitchen.

I felt slight warmth trailing across between the waistband of my jeans and the hem of my shirt. I looked down to find Trent's fingers trailing across my lower back. I looked up to his face a saw the same smile he had given me earlier. The smile that spoke wonders about our night together. My hand reached out to slap his hand away from my skin. Instead Trent caught my hand and held on to it. Under the counter table he held my hand tight against his. He pulled me a bit to him, our faces inches from one another. He whispered in my ear.

"Who's the idiot?" His breath sent chills down my spine. I rather die than let him know that. I took a bite of my apple and chewed very slowly. He looked at me with annoyance and I was glad I was annoying him. It's really becoming one of my favorite hobbies.

He took the apple from my hand and took a huge bite. "Hey! Get your own!" I reached out to take it away from him.

But at my voice Ceri and Quen turned at looked at us. They had an extremely confused look on their faces. When Quen turned his first instinct was to protect Trent, but there was nothing to protect him from. Well they probably both expected a bigger deal that what it appeared. Trent and I bickering over an apple.

Trent had a smug smile on his face when I couldn't take the apple from him. "Quen tell Trent to give me back my apple."

"Um…Trent? I am pretty sure that apple wasn't yours" I could tell Ceri was having a hard time trying to hold her laughter inside.

"It wasn't his. IT's mines." I helpfully added in.

"IT's mines now." He said taking another large bite. I felt like I was in grade school and being bullied. I got up from my stool glared at Trent. I started walking out of the kitchen but before I left I grabbed a grape from the fruit basket Ceri had made and threw at Trent. It hit him square in the head. I could hear Ceri laughing.

At the diner table Trent sat next to me again. Everybody ate and talked. We had an on going conversation. And for sometime Trent was very quiet, I even forgot he was next to me. After eating I sat back on the chair and realized that Trent was staring at me. Everybody else was wrapped up in the conversation to notice. He took my hand which was in my lap and slowly caressed my fingers. His fingers left both chills and fires through mines, which then traveled through the rest of my body. I doubt he had any idea how he was affecting me because his eyes held a question that his voice asked a few seconds later.

"Is that okay?" He asked low enough for only me to hear.

"Yeah."

"…Rachel. " At the sound of my name I quickly snatched my hand out of Trent's.

"What?" I asked the speaker who I was pretty sure was Jenks. IT was Jenks. He had flown over to the table spot between Trent and me.

"Tink's titties, the two of you are disturbing. Cut it out or someone's bound to notice." I felt like drowning the pixie in juice.

"Gee, Thanks, Jenks. " I rolled my eyes at him.

"I'll be back." I announce to everybody. I made my way to the bathroom.

After I got out, instead of heading back to everybody I headed outside. I stood on the side of the house, hidden from plain view breathing in the cool November air. I began thinking about today. Today had been a great day and despite Trent being here it still was. I've been avoiding him for weeks, but I am surprisingly happy to see him despite his annoying tactics.

As if summoned by my thoughts he soon appeared at my side. I did not look at him, but I knew it was him because the wind carried his scent towards me.

"Not that it's any of my business; but what're you doing out here?" I asked him.

"Getting some fresh air." He simply said. I looked at him and saw that his eyes were observing the horizon. Or rather his eyes were pointing there but he appeared to be thinking of something else. And very far away. With him distracted I kept on staring at him. And a slow smile spread over my lips. He was a view. It was dark out here but the moon casted a silver shade to his features. He fitted the description of the elves and fey in the stories written a long time ago for children. Suddenly Trent looked at me and caught me staring in awe at him and I quickly looked away. Great, like he needed a bigger head.

He grabbed my face with both hands, firm but gentle this time and made me face him. He stared into my eyes. And his lips came down on mines. It was a lot like the last time, but it was also so different. I don't know which one I liked better. The night we slept together he had been rough, and wild, and just- it was just burning passion. This kiss today was firm and demanding and the passion was there but there was softness, gentleness that I never thought Trent could have. He was making me feel…like maybe I meant something to him. The kiss ended and his arms wrapped around my body, I could feel his hands shaking a bit. He hugged me tight. I did not know what to do, and then I hesitantly brought my arms around him too. And at that he squeezed a little bit tighter. His hands no longer shaking.

In the month that followed Trent and I had many _many_…meetings. All secret touches and caresses. We would sometimes bump into each other in public and if we passed by each other we would give each other touches so small that nobody would see. A caressing of fingertips that would send chills down my spine, quick kisses that would only take a second. We basically couldn't keep our hands off each other. We had some silent agreement that no one must ever know and that we couldn't seriously fall for each other. Ever. But as fate plays us, there were some days that I was hard imagining life without him, there were times I would decide to end this, but as soon as I saw his face, and I had him laying next to me that would change. There were times I felt strange things inside me. And there were times were I would catch him staring at me intensely with a look in his eyes that deep inside made me grief. Because deep inside us both knew it could never be.

_It doesn't end here of course. So you know the drill…to be continued…._

****

_Anyways there was a quote I used that said" kisses are a better fate than wisdom" that was written by E.E. Cummings in "Since feeling is first"_

_Okay so I was saying in the beginning about the songs that go with the chapter, here they are._

Chapter 5 Soundtrack:

1. After Tonight- Justin Nozuka

2. Amazed- Poe

3. Believe-The Bravery

4. Coffee shop- Landon Pigg

5. Currents- Confessional Dashboard

6. Disintergreation- Jimmy eats world

7. Fall for you- Secondhand Serenade

8. How my heart Behaves- Feist

9. Just Hold me- Maria Mena

10. The secret's in Telling- Confessional Dashboard

11. Vulnerable- Secondhand Serenade


	6. Chapter 6 The end

_Okay so this is chapter 6, and i hope you like it....Thaks all you guys for the reviews. Keep on writing more, i love to know what you think : )_

A knock on my door interrupted me from my paperwork.

"Come in." i said without looking up. I heard footsteps as someone approached my desk.

"Trent can we talk." The voice belonged to Quen and he sounded very serious.

"Yeah, just give me a second." I finished the paperwork i had been filling. I looked up to find Quen sitting across from me.

"What's wrong Quen?" I asked him.

"Trent, I...Well i know it's none of my business but...what's going on between you and Rachel?" Oh that.

"Nothing." I looked down at my paperwork, and picked up a pen, busying myself with something to do.

"I am not blind Sa'han." He was going into his wise man mode. He did that when he didn't approve of something.

"We've been sleeping together." I put it in the most simple terms i could possibly say, and the less details possible.

Truth is Rachel and I had been sleeping together very often in the past months. Every time we ended up alone it was unavoidable, the lust i felt for her was overwhelming. I can't sit next to her and not touch her, even just a small touch, barely there. We have temporarily sated our lust on every available surface, when the fire burns we have to put it out. Many, many places in my house hold memories of us and our...acts. I thought that maybe by now, that having her as many times as i had that this thing burning inside of me would be sated but it grows worse. And i fear that it's no longer only lust, but something quite terrifying, something that can't be.

"Trent, anybody with eyes can see that, i catch the passing smiles and touches between the two of you.-"

"It's just lust Quen." I lied.

"Right, and repeating that i am not blind i see the way she looks at you Sa'han and it has changed, sometimes there's still annoyance but now theres also a...tenderness. I see the way your eyes sparkle when she enters a room. What do you feel for her?"

"Nothing...Lust"

"I know you Trent"

"I know." the whisper escaped my lips.

What was i going to tell Quen. I was confused about Rachel, about me. But i have always had a good sense of direction and i knew that anything more simply couldn't be between us. She was a witch and i and elf. It simply couldn't be.

"What do you intend to do?" He asked his face intent. Quen was bringing forward all the questions that i had asked myself. But hearing them aloud and from somebody Else's lips made them all the more real. They made me realize that choices had to be made.

"I don't know." I truly didn't know.

"Do you love her?"

"That cannot be, Quen and you know it well"

"But do you love her?"  
I got up from my chair and began pacing, it seemed to be a habit when i was thinking intently or emotional. Perhaps i did love her but that doesn't change anything at all.

"She's a witch." I simply said.

"You have to end this Trent before it goes to far." His scarred face was worried. I don't know if it was for me or for Rachel, or maybe for the both of us.

"Quen"

"This...game- it's not going to end well... I can see there's something there but you are two stubborn to admit it." A sigh escape his lips. "If you don't love her, or if you think it cannot be then just let her go and end it. She's falling for you Trent, save her and yourself the heartache, end it before it's too deep... With all due respect Sa'han your being selfish...She has other opportunities, others that are willing to admit they love her"

I knew of a few others that were willing to admit love. One of them was the infuriating witch Marshall, just thinking about him touching her, laying next to her, saying the words that i wasn't capable of saying made my blood burn. Made me angry. But thinking of her, holding him and loving him gave me a feeling that i had never felt before. Like a hole in my torso and everything being ripped out. It hurt.

"Don't hurt her Trent. She's strong but shes also incredibly frail." And with those last words he walked out of my office.

"I'll end it. Before it's too late." I said to nobody but myself.

***

_Rachel's point of view:_

I had just come back from a run to find the church empty. It was an easy run. Retrieve an old charm from a very stupid criminal. Piece of cake. As soon as i came home i made myself comfortable, changed into sweat pants and a tank top. I went to the kitchen and started to make coffee. It was about 9pm but hey it's never too late to make coffee.

The doorbell rang and i went to get it. I opened the door and Trent was there standing casually, but the first thing i noticed was the small tightness in his eyes. It made me want to reach out and smooth it from his brows.

"What's wrong?" i asked him. Despite our...affair...it was strange for Trent to visit at this time.

"We need to talk"

I nodded and motioned him inside. Closing the door on Jonathan who was waiting outside for him, leaning against the limo. I walked to the kitchen and Trent followed me. I motioned him to one of the stools around the island. He didn't sit.

"This wont take long"

I picked up my mug of coffee and took a long sip leaning my butt against the counter in back of me. I was kinda hiding the anxiety i was feeling. Inside i was a nervous wreck. I think i knew what he wanted to talk about me and him. He was so distant and so...cold. Stoic. And deep inside me i knew this couldn't be good. Or perhaps it was good, but i didn't feel it so.

"This... between us..has to end." The tightness around his eyes was still there, but the cold mask was blinding. It was like he wasn't feeling anything.. And for all i knew maybe he wasn't. Maybe it was a game to him. One that should end now.

I gave him the only thing i was capable of giving him at the moment, a small nod that didn't escape his eyes. I couldn't move, i really couldn't. It felt as if i so much as move a finger my whole body would fall to pieces. I felt incredibly frail as if one movement could kill me. And maybe it could. I didn't know i felt so much for him untill this moment.

"Are we at an understanding?" He said. Killing me, stabbing me with every word.

"We are." I was proud of myself, because even though my heart was breaking my voice was strong. I would not show him that his decision affected me at all. I've lost before and I've survived. I'll survive again.

He gave a small nod before turning around, and heading out of the kitchen but before he did two words escaped my lips and to my amazement my voice still sounded strong to me.

"Why now?"

He didn't turn around. But after a second he turned his head enough to look at me. And with a mocking gentle smile he said "Because you are no longer of use to me." And with that he walked out.

After i heard the door shut it took me some time to get myself together. I didn't know what i was feeling for a moment, it was too much at once, my heart felt like it was brutally carved out. And it was. The pain inside me was unbearable. But i was also angry, so incredibly angry, at him, at the world, but above all at myself. For allowing myself to believe he would care for me, that he had a heart. I was a fool to believe that he cared for me. And at that moment i the incredible anger flooded me and i threw my mug against the wall, shattering it into a thousand porcelain pieces. I crashed, broke and slammed other objects that my anger wouldn't let me identified.

But when the anger was gone there was only one of the most devastating things left. A broken heart, I should have a hole where my heart should be, a huge gap.

"I will not cry for him, I will not- CRY." The words came out like a growl.

"I will not be weak, he can't harm me, i will stay strong"

But he Had harmed me. He had broken me. And tonight i had to be weak, i had to be weak to then be strong, i had to endure. My knees wouldn't hold me any longer, and i slid to the floor, my back leaning against the counter, chin on my knees. How ironic life was, a broken heart from my enemy. He hadn't killed me, but he had ripped out my heart.

I don't know for how long i remained in that position time seemed to mean nothing at that moment. Distantly i heard the front door open.. I heard quiet footsteps and ivy's voice.

"Rachel." She kneeled in front of me. "Rachel hun, what's wrong"

But i couldn't talk not yet anyways. I had sated my tears, and in this position my heart didn't ache as badly. But if i talked i knew my concentration would shatter. But it seemed that i needed no words. Ivy's brows furrowed and anger flashed through her eyes.

"Trent." She said fiercely. And with that i knew that she knew about us.

I gave a small nod. She picked my up, cradled me in her arms, as if i weighted nothing. But then again to her i probably didn't. She took me to my room and laid me in my bed. I curled myself into the possible size. Ivy laid next to me. Spooning me holding me together. And i though of how difficult this must be for her being this close to me.

"You don't have to stay." i managed to whispered, my voice broke.

"It's okay" She smoothed back my hair. I felt like a child again. A very sick child. Sick of heartache.

"It's okay, It's okay"

Tomorrow I'd be strong. I would pull myself together. But today i was just human, heartbroken and weak. I didn't know i had loved Trent until he ended it. I knew i felt something for him, but love- i would have never thought so. Love was...too much. But i did and i do. Now that it's over i realize that i love him. I love him too much for my own good. But I've survived loss before, And I'll do it again. It's what i do. I survive.

I fell asleep that night with a broken heart and a vampire friend as my only consolation.

_To be continued ....._

_ And heres the soundtrack : )_

_ 1. Almost lover- A fine Frenzy- Rach_

_ 2. Better than me- hinder- Trent_

_ 3. Bittersweet Symphony- Apocalyptica- Trent_

_ 4. Breathe me- Sia-Rach_

_ 5. Dare you to move- Switchfoot- Rach_

_ 6.I Don't love you- MCR- Rach_

_ 7.I will always love you- Whitney Huston- Trent_

_ 8.I wish the best for you- Emerson Hart_

_ 9. Listen to your heart- DHT- Trent_

_ 10. Mr. Brightside- The killers- Trent_

_ 11. On my own- Les Miserables_

_ 12. Here without you- Three doors down- Trent_

_ 13. Man in the wilderness- Stynx- Trent_


	7. Chapter 7 Crap on toast

"When i tell you so, make a run for it, i can hold them back for a few and well run together. Here take the bag." I handed ivy the messenger bag that had the plant inside. She put it over her shoulders.

"that's not a very good idea."

"It's the best there is right now, we have to run like hell, no pun intended." I knew i could do this. She gave me a small nod.

_This_ meant a lot of things. We were currently in the ever-after. A few weeks ago i had found a spell in one of Al's books that expanded the lifespan of pixies. The spell wasn't difficult, and the only downer seemed that i would get another smut in my soul; like i needed any more. But there was another bad thing. One of the ingredients required was a rare flower. The flower was similar to a lily but the petals were black and purple and it was only grown in the ever-after. Human world didn't have the magic in the soil to sustain it.

So i stole the spell from the book. I copied it over in a sheet of paper. I wasn't going to ask AL to lend it to me, he would simply refuse. I talked to Ivy about it and told her that i had found a spell to expand pixie life span. As soon as i told her i needed to make a trip to the ever-after to get an essential ingredient she opposed the trip. Saying it was simply too risky. I had told her i would do it with or without her approval, i wasn't going to let Jenks of Matalina die. She accepted on one condition. To come along.

So now here we were, in the ever after. Where the the sky was eternally night, and the buildings ruins of what they once were. This was a depressing place. Scary but over all sad. The ruins screamed abandonment and death and the trees seemed to cry with it. I had come with a map of the ever-after, courtesy of AL, who thinks i should get familiar with the place anyways. I jumped the lines with Ivy and we landed in the church. The one that had been a safe haven when i had come here with _him_, which seemed like an eternity ago.

From the church we had to go through the line of trees to remain unseen by anything. After the Trees followed an old road that still had proof of of the life that had once inhabited the ever after. And after the road we made it inside the cave of secrets. That's what the map calls it, i kid you not. And it was indeed a cave of secrets. Where the rest of the ever after seemed desolated, dry and dead the cave was all but. Water ran through it, and the water reflected across the ceiling. And inside where carvings that made it seem more like a temple than a cave. Carvings of elves, and Celtic symbols, beautiful. It made me think that one, perhaps thousands of years ago the ever after was beautiful. We made it through the cave without any incident and at the end of the cave we found the flowers were were searching for.

Our trip back out of the cave was uneventful, but as soon as we were on the road i felt eyes on us, i heard movements here and there. Ivy knew we were being followed, she had simply to look at me and we fell on silent agreement, to pretend that we knew nothing until they decided to come out. That way it'll give us time to get to the trees. And we made it halfway through the trees.

I was surprised that the first sign to make themselves known was not an attack. Dogs for a lack of better term surrounded us, Ivy and i came closer together, our backs pressed against each other, guarding ourselves. We were surrounded by trees, like in woods. The air was cold, i could see my breath in front of me.

The dogs that came forward were strange dogs, huge the size of a large Irish wolfhound. But i think these would more likely be called hell hounds. They were beautiful and sleek, with glossy black fur and eyes the color of winter, a very pale blue. They weren't growling. But they looked ready to pounce at any little thing. Their eyes calculated every movement.

A few seconds later a man emerged from the Trees. He reminded me of the hunt. He was wearing dark green robes- what is it with demons and green. He was tall and majestic, with long white hair hair and skin as white as his hair. From his feature he wasn't old maybe 30 at most, but his aura was a different story. There was an oldness to him, ancient. I stared into his lizard eyes. I could smell the Cinnamon in him. For all his beauty he was a demon. I think I've read about him and his dogs. And they weren't good things.

"Rachel Morgan." There was amusement in his voice, he was mocking me.

Crap on toast, i much rather be here with Newt. This guy scared the hell out of me, it was an internal fear, made your heart ache and your stomach turn, It made your mind desperate. That was one of his powers, the fear he radiated. He slowly stepped towards me. I held my open palm out, as if trying to stop him, like that would actually stop him.

He smiled at me, if i didn't know any better i would think that he was sweet. Yeah right. Sweet my ass.

"Alistair" I whispered.

"You know of me." And to that i gave a small nod. He looked at Ivy who was surrounded by the hell hounds. "A vampire...I haven't had a vampire in a very long time." By having he didn't mean eating or sex oh no, he meant torturing, ah crap. This wasn't good.

"What do you want?" I managed to ask. Inside i could barely make a coherent thought. Oh god.

He cocked his head to the side, a gesture that reminded me alot of his hell-hounds. Inspecting me, waiting for me. He lifted an eyebrow. A small whimper escaped my lips and that brought a beautiful smile to his face.

Choices, Choices, choices. We could run, but these hell-hounds were extremely fast, ivy could probably outrun them but chances were that i couldn't. And if we run from them how can i protect us so that a fireball or an arrow or something will not hit us. Aw man!!This really sucks. Okay think Rachel, Think. Can i make a circle around ivy and i while we run?, No no that's too sketchy and if we run and i couldn't keep the circle in place it would be disastrous. What about if i make the circle around Alistair and his hell-hounds, its gonna be a hell of a big circle and it won't hold for long, but we don't need long, just a head start.

"When i tell you so, make a run for it, i can hold them back for a few and well run together. Here take the bag." I handed ivy the messenger bag that had the plant inside. She put it over her shoulders.

"that's not a very good idea."

"It's the best there is right now, we have to run like hell, no pun intended." I knew i could do this. She gave me a small nod.

"Okay on R."

"Okay."

Alistair was definitely amused. His smile was enough to see that. "This shall be fun, a hunt, how i love those. I want to see what you can do love, i always love a woman who fights back. I am going to enjoy breaking you, see how long you last." His voice a low and sweet. Except for the words that were coming out of his mouth.

"Run." WE ran as fast as we could until we were no longer surrounded with Alistair and his hounds, And at that i called.

"Rhombus!" and the circle came up around Alistair and his hounds. It wasn't going to hold off for long so we kept running.

When your running and your afraid the run seems like a very long time, and eternity. Like you've been running forever and nothing matters but to keep running. That's how i felt. I looked over at ivy and she seemed to feel the same way too. We ran for what seemed like hours but was probably only 15 minutes. The circle weakened with each step until i felt nothing at all.

Ivy made it first, opening the door to the church. I was still a good distance from safety when i heard Alistair and his hounds gaining on me.

I heard Alistair call my name.

"Rachel, love where are your manners?" He didn't sound angry, but rather like an adult correcting a child.

I didn't dare look back. I was almost at the doors when i looked at ivy and saw that her eyes were wide and she was staring at Alistair.

As any other person i looked back and saw that he had indeed gained on us, but he was just standing there with his hound, and his hand he had a very scary looking energy ball.

"Oh don't worry love, it shan't kill you, but you'll have to be back for answers." He said when my eyes fell on it.

He threw the energy ball at me and just as i reached the church it hit me. Damn worst of luck. When the energy ball hit me, it hit me in me lower back. I thought i would've felt fire or shock, but that's not what i felt. I knew it hit me in my lower back because it felt cool. It started cool at one point and then the coolness spreads all over my body.

I reached ivy then and i literally tackled her and sent us both out of the ever-after.

***

"Rachel are you okay?" Ivy got up from where she landed and walked towards me. She held out a hand and i took it.

"Yup, could be better, but yup i am good."

"Are you sure?, i saw the energy-ball go into you." She looked at me skeptically, searching for any signs of harm.

"I am-" That's when the coughing fit started. I coughed so many times that i lost count. I could barely pull in a breath without it leading into another fit. I covered my mouth with one hand and leaned into the island with another.

"Rachel." I could hear the worry in Ivy's voice.

"It's just-" Cough. My coughing seemed to calm a bit. And Finally i was able to stand straight. I looked at ivy and her eyes were wide. She looked at me with the same worry that was laced in her voice.

"Rachel your bleeding." I looked down at my hands and noticed that the one i had over my mouth was covered in blood, but they didn't have a cut in them. The blood was from the coughing. "Your nose too." She whispered.

My clean hand automatically reached for my nose and came with blood. My head felt light, and my vision was starting to blur. I blink trying to clear it but it did no good. And it a course of a few seconds i couldn't see anything at all.

"Ivy, I can't see." I felt my strengh waver with the use of words. Second after second i felt weaker and weaker. And i hurt. My body hurt all over, and i couldn't point where i was hurting, the pain seemed to be coming from my blood, from my very cells.

"I hurt..."I lost the world at that moment. My hearing was also dimming, my senses fell far away and then i really lost conscious.


	8. Chapter 8 Difficulty of Not knowing

_Hey gals and guys , i am back. Happy New Years!!! After a series writers block i finally found direction!!! lol, okay so i finished this chapter, which is rather a necessary update of what's happening as oppose to something actually going on. Almost everything is from Trent's point of view which was refreshing and a bit frustrating- he's a rather complicated cookie, don't you think? lol...Anyways the characters all belong to brilliant Ms. Harrison, except for Alistair. I have to say, this fan-fiction was suppose to only be Rachel and Trent sleeping together but my imagination got out of hand and my fingers started twitching and i couldn't stop. lol Thank you for all your wonderful review.!! R&R this chapter. Thanks a ton!! Later _

_P.S: LIN: Luke was amazing in Hellboy II, he was such an awesome elf!!! Rather mystical i think, definitely out of the ever-after. I like Alistair every day more and more, i dunno i have a thing for crazy twisted characters. And i think I'll probably write another fanfic with him as a main focus, maybe a story with new characters or something, okay i am going to stop myself now because, i am going to get totally neurotic and start right now. Anyways thanxs a ton for the review : D _

Pain. I feel pain everywhere. I cant point out where its coming from but it's everywhere. I don't know why. I feel my eyes open but i can't see a thing. Not one thing. And i can't hear a thing either. All i see is blackness. I've never felt such pain in my life. And through the mist of the pain i see many things. Memories of people. A blond man smiles. Kisten, my mind feeds me the answer. I see the people i love. Happy moments such as my mom singing happy birthday to me as a child. My dad sitting next to me, holding my hand while i was close to dieing. Trent holding me and then saying those cruel devastating words. Kisten's death. So many people, i see in the midst of pain. So many memories and so much grief; but they remind me that there's more than this overwhelming pain. I feel a complete darkness coming again, and that is worse. It robs me of my only comfort. I feel a light touch on my face. I don't know who's touching my face but it brings great comfort. Such a small gesture. I lean into it. I don't know what happened...God help me. I must be dieing.

***********************************************************************

_Trent's POV:_

Heather was laying next to me, on my bed. Blond hair wild on the silk white sheets. She softly caressed my hand closest to her and i snatched it away. I could see the look of hurt in her blue eyes. But I couldn't care less. I don't care about her. I don't know what i care about anymore. I put my arms behind my head. And stared up at the ceiling.

"Do you love me?" She asked, her voice soft.

"No" I wasn't going to lie to her. I got what i wanted last night.

"I don't love you either." She was saying the truth. Our relationship has been one of convenience and nothing more. A good name in the papers, or a warm bed at night. Nothing more. When she kisses me my mind starts thinking of someone else.

I am not a fool. I realize that love is not for me. Maybe i deny myself that right, but i have every reason to. It's much too complicated and it blurs my priorities.

Being with _her_ was one of the greatest things I've ever experienced. The electricity and burn of her touch. Our bodies together. Something inside me that I've never felt before. I longed for her with every fiber of my being. All so beautiful. It all had to end. I ended it and broke something inside her and something inside me.

If a year ago you would've asked me what was the perfect way to really get to Rachel i would've said simply killing her, a gun to her head, something to end her life. I never realized how powerful other things were. And then we began our game. Sleeping together, being with one another. And she grew inside me until i no longer wanted to harm her, but to protect her. Until i no longer thought of her of an annoyance but something more. Something i cherished. And because it could not be, this between her and I, I ended it.

I remember that day like it was today rather than months ago. I remember what i said to her and i hate myself for it. I am disgusted with myself. Disgusted that i hurt her so, disgusted that i have a woman in my bed only to forget her, but all the while thinking about her. "Because you are no longer of use to me." I was wise to choose those words. Wise because they would just be so final. I know she always thought that i only use things and people and perhaps something inside of her believed that i was using her too. She stood frozen that moment. Her eyes wide. And i knew that if i turned around and looked at her again, i couldn't bare the devastated look upon her face. I couldn't bare seeing her body frozen and just ready to collapse. I couldn't bare being the one who had done that to her.

Ever since that day i don't allow her name to be spoken aloud. I forbid it. Everybody in my household knows better. I keep away from people, women who remind me of her. I think i loved her. And i still do.

"You called me Rachel last night." I didn't look at Heather but i felt her eyes on me. I felt my body tense and my eye twitch.

"Let it go, Heather." I told her in a low voice. But as stubborn as she was she didn't.

"I don't appreciated being called the name of that _whore_." So much venom in her voice. I automatically looked at her. Her face paled. But she lifted her chin slightly, showing defiance.

"I don't understand what you see in her?" I gritted my teeth together. She didn't exactly know about Rachel and I, but she knew that i didn't like to hear her name.

"Get out." I simply said.

"What?" She had a confused looked on her face. She obviously wasn't expecting this. She seemed to have forgotten who she was dealing with. She seemed to have forgotten that i never cared about her and that her place in my bed could easily be replaced.

"Out."

"But-" I quickly stood up from my bed and walked around to where she was. I grabbed her arm and forcibly took her towards the door.

"What the hell do you think your doing? You asshole!" I threw her outside into the hallway. And closed the door on her.

"Trent!, Damn it! You bastard! let me get my clothes!" She kept on pounding on the door. I picked up every thing that belonged to her in the room and opened the door and threw it outside with her.

I called Quen and told him to get rid of Heather for me. She was no longer welcomed here.

"What did she do Sa'han?" I could hear him breathing on the other side. And because it was Quen i knew i couldn't lie to him I said:

"She said her name." And hung up.

***********************************************************************

"Well gentlemen, i see you next time." I said to my visitors, standing from my chair behind my desk. They stood too and we shook hands.

"It was a pleasure doing business with you, Mr. Kalamack." One of the men said. I plastered a fake politician smile on my face.

While i was shaking hand with them i could hear light steps quickly approaching my office. I could hear other steps follow in more of a frenzie. In a matter of seconds Ivy Tamwood barged into my office. Jonathan and Quen soon followed. Jonathan was holding his nose. I could see blood dripping on my carpet. Quen who was behind Jonathan had a worried look on his face. I looked back at Ms. Tamwood and realize why.

When my eyes first laid on her i realize she was holding someone, cradling her in her arms. The woman she was cradling wore a white hospital gown. Her red hair was wild around her face. I saw this all when my eyes first saw Ms. Tamwood, but my mind wisely ignored the familiarity of the red hair and the thin body. When i looked at Ms. Tamwood again, it hit me like a mad-truck. Rachel was the woman laying in Ms. Tamwood's arms. Her skin looked a deadly pale, her veins were extremely visible, like painted pale blue snakes on her face and body. She looked dead. The only life to her now was her Hair. She was dead.

"Sa'han, i tired to stop her-" I looked up at Jonathan and i guess he bit back his words because of the look in my face.

I didn't realize that i had crossed the space between us. One of The gentlemen i had been making business said: "I think we will be leaving" and i only nodded.

I stood in front of Ms. Tamwood and looked at Rachel. I don't know what i was feeling. Grief, Anger, Pain? All too much. All much too magnified.

I slowly sweeped her hair from her face. And at that she gave me hope. Her head moved a bit and she was leaning into my touch. I thought she was dead. But there was still life in her.

"You have to fix this Kalamack." I looked up at Ms. Tamwood. Her oval face was tight and her eyes were pinched with worry and grief.

"What happened?" I said and i took Rachel from her arms. At first she seemed reluctant to let go but she looked into my eyes and saw something that made her let go. I walked past her and into the hallway.

And on our way Ms Tamwood spoke.

"I don't know. She collapse weeks ago, she started coughing, and bleeding, and we've tried everything. Spells, amulets, _doctors_, nothing works and i don't know what else to try." I could hear the desperation in her voice. "Doctors say she's...dieing...from the illness she had as a child. They don't know how to...how to change that. But you do."

"I do." I simply said. I was going to put my father's research to use. I was going to put every doctor and scientist i had in my power to save her. I needed her alive, even if she and i would never be i needed the consolation that she at least was well.

"Quen I need every doctor and scientist in under my power. We are going to save Ms. Morgan." I sounded much more confident than i truly felt.

***********************************************************************

Over the course of a week much started changing yet everything remained the same. had my best team working to save Rachel, they treated her the same way my father's team had treated her as a child. And her body seemed to be improving. There was color back into her skin. And her breathing was somewhat normal. Her body seemed to be regaining health. Everything was okay except for one thing. She had yet to awaken.

And every day when i woke up i would go to the guestroom we were keeping her. Hoping today would be the day when her eyes open. But everyday my heart was broken yet again. And everyday i grew more agitated, angry and confused.

One night the witch, Marshall came to visit her. And because Rachel and I were no longer...together, i let him in. I stood there or rather sat on a chair watching her and watching him. And when he reached out to touch her, to caress her hand or to brush her hair i simply wanted to kill him. In my mind i imagined multiple murder scenarios all in which he was the victim. I gritted my teeth, my fingers curved into fists but i didn't kill him. I simply got up and told him: "Don't touch her." He responded with "She's not yours" and left.

Weeks later when Rachel showed no sign of waking I made a decision. My plan was simple. Yet not so simple. Some stood against it. Others supported me. My plan was to get one of the witches working for me to cast a spell. A spell that would put me to sleep and connect my mind with Rachel's. I trusted that her mind was still there.

And so the preparations went on for the night in which we would be...connected. looked at me with distrustful eyes and i told her "It's the only way." I knew somebody else could go for me, but i wanted to be the one to..find her.

And when the night came, I laid in the bed next to her. I took her hand in mine, and the spell was cast.

_He he, you know the drill to be continued : D_

_Oh and song for Trent - Thinking of you by Katy Perry_


	9. Chapter 9 Broken SOul

_Yay, i finally typed it down. I had started this chapter like 5 times, but i was never satisfied because it just didn't fit. It was weak. I dunno i wasn't feeling it, but then i started getting obsessive and started writing down every idea i had, and by doing this it became easier and FINALLY i got it lol. Omg i am so incredibly happy that White witch, black curse comes out in less than a month!!!! omg omg omg, but that also means i have a deadline. I wanna finish this story before it comes out. SO i am gonna be beasting lol. I also am excited to write some fanfiction for the fever series by Karen Marie Moning, It's awesome, If you like the hollows series definitely pick the fever books from the library or whatever. _

_So Saturday i went to watch the Underworld: Rise of the lycans, It was phenomenal!!! totally random but i had to add that in there lmaoo..._

_Anyways Thanks a million for your reviews, it motivates me more and more. : ) okay so i am gonna shut up now, and start writing the next chapter lol :P _

There was a voice slowly seeping through my mind, dragging me little by little out of the darkness. And i felt no pain this time. It wasn't memories keeping me afloat. I clung to the sound of that voice. Following it, clinging to it like it was the last light in the dark. And of course it was.

Every second i became more aware that the voice was familiar. Low, with melodic undertones, simply beautiful. A voice that caused my heart to feel as if a fist was squeezing it. I knew that voice. It had once robbed me of my heart. I still haven't found it. My heart that is. As the voice became clearer i realize that my other senses were working well, i could smell him. Crushed leaves, and Cinnamon. And there was no overwhelming pain, not anymore. And I was glad there wasn't.

While I was in pain the seconds seemed longer, more like hours and the hours like days. And amidst of the pain i found comfort only in dim memories happy and painful alike. But they weren't enough because the devastating darkness would engulf me and there was only emptiness. Unbearable, ruthless, insatiable emptiness.

And there was this voice in the darkness, a voice that called my name, and beckoned me with it's melodies. But it wasn't _his _voice. It was a voice i was incredibly afraid of. The voice belonged to the being that had put me here, in this world of devastating nothingness. Alistair.

Everyday, or maybe it was every hour of darkness or pain he said to me "Just say the word Rachel, and it'll be over." And if i had the strength to loudly and angrily refuse him i would have proudly told him to turn himself.

For what felt like decades i held on, I held on to everything i was, a witch, a daughter, a friend, i held on to everything i love. I braved the storm, standing against the pain, fighting the darkness with every part of my being. But then i couldn't do it anymore, I was beyond exhausted, everything i held on to now seemed thousands of miles away, too far for me to grasp. And because there was nothing worth fighting for i gave up. I held on through the torturous pain for what felt like an eternity, but then when he said again for maybe the millionth time "Just say the word..." He broke me. Because i didn't remember what was worth fighting for, he broke me.

I said the words. I accepted. I do not know what but i accepted.

"Take me. I am yours." I told him....

This was his doing, Alistair's. I knew that because i accepted whatever he wanted I was going to be...freed. He was going to remove the chains on my soul, but wrap chains on my body.

"...Rachel, Come on open your eyes...wake up damn it..."

And my eyes did open. Trent's bruised face came into view. Bruised? Trent? What the hell was he doing here? He was leaning over me. I closed my eyes again, willing him to go away. I felt him move and there was a noise when he moved. Something that sounded alot like chains. Chains? I opened my eyes and saw where the sounds were coming from. There was a steel choker around his neck. There was a chain on the choker, a chain connected to the stone walls. Like an animal.

I took in the rest of the room. From seeing Trent chained like an animal i thought that maybe we were in a dungeon, or a prison, or something, but the rest of the room didn't seem like a prison. The walls were stone yes, but it was more like a guest room in a medieval castle. Tapestries, Tall windows, vanity, and the canopy bed in which i was laying.

I moved the covers aside and looked down at myself. I was wearing green robes reminiscent of those Minias, or Newt or...Alistair wears. Great. Just Freaking great. I was in the eve-rafter, i have no idea how i got here and Trent's chained to a wall. Waking up sucks.

I slowly got sat up, and went to get up, turning my back on Trent. My body was not working as fast as i wanted to. My movements were deliberate and slow tainted with the uncertainty of long disuse. When i stood on my feet, my legs wouldn't hold me and i fell on the stone floor. I scowled at my legs as if that would give them back immediately the strentgh i knew would come in minutes, or hours. While i was staring at my legs i heard the rattling of chain. His scent hit me like a wave, wrapping itself around me reminded me of things best left forgotten. He crouched in front of me, his hands moving towards me. Perhaps to help me up or maybe to strangle me. It was Trent after all. Businessman, drug lord, murderer,...amongst other things.

When i saw his hand reaching towards me, i flinched. I hated myself for that reaction, for showing him weakness. But i couldn't help myself. I saw the look in his eyes. He wasn't looking at me with hate. His face bruised and beautiful stood proud and stoic. There was the tightness around his eyes that told me my flinching bothered him. Or maybe it was being chained to a wall that bothered him. I am betting on the latter one.

Surprisingly his hands reached out a second time. But as weak as I was I've always been proud.

"Don't touch me." My voice sounded odd to my ears. With a raspy undertone.

"Fine." He said a few seconds later and his face shutdown completely. Putting on the cool businessman persona. I was surprised and a bit awed that he could keep such a poker face while being kept in such a degrading way. But then again it was Trent, and he was a master in the arts of deceiving.

I slowly moved my legs, stretching them, bringing my knees up and down, giving them movement and getting rid of the stiffness. I felt Trent settle on the floor across from me, looking at me but i decided to ignore him. I didn't want to talk to him or look at him for that matter, no more than necessary. But being the only person i was here with who might actually know something i decided to swallow my pride and talk to him.

"What are you doing here?" I said. I didn't know how to express the many questions inside of me. SO i settled for a simple one.

"I got dragged here trying to bring you back." If I wasn't but a few feet away from him i wouldn't have heard him. Before i could think any about it i looked up to his face. IT told me nothing. He had a sinister mocking smile in his face. Typical. He was going to blame this on me.

"Well nobody told you to try to save me, and besides i don't need you or anyone to save me." I knew my lips had gone into a tight line.

"Yes of course." Thick sarcasm flowed through his voice. I just scowled at him. And he sighted. When he sighted i could see the real stress in him. Everything he wanted to kept hidden came to the surface.

"You've been in a...coma for the past 6 weeks. Ms. Tamwood came to me for help, and out of the kindness of my heart i decided to help you-"

"Out of the kindness of your heart? Who are you trying to kid Trent-" Saying his name aloud sent tingles down my spine, and tighten my heart.

"You were suffering from the same illness you did as a child. We were able to cure your body...but you wouldn't wake up, for weeks we waited for you to wake up but you just wouldn't wake up...One of my witches stirred a spell, or rather a...curse. Somebody would go into your mind to try to bring you back. I choose to...connect with you, but instead of connecting with your mind we were brought here...At first i thought that perhaps this was your mind, but then the demon made sure i understood that we weren't in your head. That we are in the ever after." He smiled bitterly.

"Who took the imbalance?"

"I did." He simply said. He took an imbalance to save me. What the hell?

"Why?" But he didn't answer my question, so i asked another one.

"Did he tell you why we were here?"

"Because you accepted. You choose to be here."

I did, didn't i. Trying to escape the pain, i accepted whatever he wanted. And so he hauled my ass here. Body and soul. And since Trent was connected with me at the moment, i guess he came along for the ride.

"Morgan, What did you accept?" His voice was careful, and if i didn't know any better i would have thought it was fearful for whatever i had this time brought upon myself.

"I don't know."

"You don't know? Are you sure?"

"I don't know Trent!" Desperation colored my voice. It is difficult not knowing. I stood from the floor. Holding on to the side table. My legs had gained the some strength upon this second try. I paced slowly around the room. Each step giving my limbs strength and sureness. Trent had stood also, and sat on the edge of the large bed.

"Rachel..." I turned to look at him. "When you were unconscious, you sometimes moaned, and writhed as if in pain. What was happening?" I guess he understood the difference between body and soul. And for that i decided to answer him.

"I was in pain...In a torture chamber that was my body, burning alive from the inside out, for what felt like a very long time." I managed to say, my voice barely a whisper.

He simply nodded as if he understood. We stood there staring at each other, not blinking.

Our stare down was interrupted by the door opening. And in stepped Alistair. Tall beautiful. His hair white hair shinning under the lighting. He took my breath away. It wasn't his beauty that took my breath away though, it was the fear. He was beautiful, and evil which in the end made him all the more terrifying.

"Rachel, love you've awaken. Oh what a joy it is to see you've finally done so. WE have so much to get at." He said smiling at me while he said it. Yeah i believed that smile. After being tortured in my head for what felt like years. I believed the menace behind the smile.

"Alistair." I said breathlessly. Motivated by me speaking his name he crossed the distance between us and stood right in front of me. He smiled evilly showing his straight strong white teeth. He reached out to brush my hair from my face. I let him. I was frozen. I was frozen because something foolish and childish inside of me thought that if i stood very still he wouldn't notice me, he wouldn't harm me. He'd leave. But that wasn't the case. When his hands made contact with my skin my fear became all the greater, my breathing became ragged and uneven. I was gasping for air. I knew my fear was tangible. His smile deepened. He leaned into me putting his cheek to my cheek. He inhaled deeply, tasting my fear. Enjoying it. Unable to stop myself I closed my eyes. I felt his face move down to my neck. I was so afraid of him, I didn't know what to do. I just stood there hoping he'd go away soon. And when the seconds stretched, inside i became more hysterical. Tears slipped through my closed lids.

There was a loud noise. Something had fallen to the floor. I automatically opened my eyes. Alistair has still touching me but he too turned to see where the noise came from. Trent, dear god in my terror for Alistair i had forgotten all about him. He stood a good distance behind Alistair. He had made the noise, he had dropped something I was too thankful to even realize what. His lips were close to a snarl. His wispy white-blond hair had fallen to to his face, and his green eyes stood bright with hate, fear and defiance. With the collar and the chain he really did look like a chained animal.

I could see the menace in Alistair's face. HE was ready to kill someone.

"You are in need of some manners muck. I can do more than bruise your face." How i knew that he could give more than bruises.

He let go of me and started striding towards Trent. And for the first time since waking up, the fear for Trent was stronger than for myself. Perhaps it was because i didn't think that Trent could survive being broken. Or perhaps it was because despite everything, i still loved him, and i wanted no harm to come to him.

Before Alistair reached Trent i crossed the distance and stood in front of Trent.

"He's got nothing to do with this. let him go, please, you got what you wanted."

I moved a couple of steps and stood right in front of Alistair. I copied the gesture he had done earlier. I moved his hair from his face. Putting it behind his ear. My body was cold with fear, but i did it anyways. And he let me. Fear is a wasted emotion. It helps you with nothing. At my touch Alistair leaned in.

"Your fear is intoxicating." He said his goat slitted eyes half closed.

"Don't hurt him. Please."

"Why?"

"Because he's...he's...he's my friend." A soft snort escaped Alistair.

And because Trent was Trent and he was so full of pride he said "I am touched Morgan, but i don't need you to defend me from this demon." I could hear the tightness in his voice.

"Perhaps you do, muck. You've got pride, but when I am done with you you'll be begging me to stop. You shan't even recognize the word." Alistair moved me out of the way and crossed the distance left between him and Trent. They stood face to face. The elf with a collar around his neck, his face full of rage and anger, and the demon with his old presence and emotionless face.

I felt a change in the air. And before i knew it AL in his crushed green velvet attire was there along with Newt. Funny to think that the demon who had once hunted me, hunted my soul, now gave me incredible hope. Al always finds his way around disadvantages or contracts one way or another. And this time i was hoping he'd help me out.

"Newt love, I told you that he was the one keeping her. He kidnaps one that may be of your kin. He shows no respect. As good as Minias, he is. Waiting for you to turn your back to betray you." I've never been so glad to hear his upper crust British accent.

Alistair had something new to focused his attention on. He soon forgot Trent.

"Your in my domain."

"You've seemed to have forgotten your place Alistair. Your domain is my domain. Everything is mine." She cocked her head to the side. Looking physcotic and ready to strike. Alistair looked at her and i knew that he hated her. IF he had a chance to rip her to shreds he would do so. I wondered what their history was, but then i decided i rather not know.

"I'll forget your disrespect Alistair. I just came to send Rachel home. I was under the impression that you were keeping her here." She directed him with disdain.

"Come along Rachel. Oh and bring your elf too..." He turned and spoke to Alistair next. "And Alistair would you please remove the"- he made a motion pointing to his neck. "-collar from his neck." I could tell Al was enjoying this way too much. He had a very smug grin of his face.

The collar opened and dropped to the floor. There was a red ring on Trent's neck where it used to be. With Alistair distracted with Newt and AL, I was standing closest to Trent. He closed the distance between us and i felt his scent, his presence wrap around me like a blanket. And i was comforted. I felt surprisingly...safe.

"Well children, I'll have to send you home, Newt and I have grown up things to talk about with Alistair." He smiled with so much joy. Al was thrilled to be putting Alistair under Newts radar. And i was thrilled to be sent home.

"Rachel,-" He bowed his head slightly."- I'll be seeing you."

I felt Trent put my hand in his and again i Flinched. I moved away from him, away from his presence. A look of hurt crossed his features. But I stretched out my hand and took his hand in mine. Only our hands were touching. I couldn't bare anything else. Part of it was because of the way he broke my heart, but another part was that I felt as if any touch could hurt me. After being alone in torturous pain for what felt like maybe a hundred years i couldn't bare a touch. I longed for it, but i was afraid. I longed to go home and scrub myself red from the memories of endless torture. I longed to close my eyes and make it all go away. But i knew that i couldn't make it go away. That i could only live with it, and do what i do best. Survive.

And when i took Trent's hand in my own his lips opened slightly and his brow furrowed as it a thought came across him. His lips opened again to say something but it was too late. We were already jumping the ley lines.

_You know the drill...To be continued : )_


	10. Chapter 10 Revelations

_Here's the last chapter, finally completed!! YAY. lol. Okay so this is it guys and gals. I am totally excited to be start working on new fanfic, cause now i have a whole lot of time in my hands lol. Anyways that you so very much, for you reviews. They motivated me to keep on writing. To know that there's people out there who actually enjoy the crap i write lol. Thank you guys, rally thank you SO MUCH. : ) _

We landed in the church from the ever-after. Trent and I side by side, holding each other's hand. We were in the living room, and there were many worried faces sitting on the couches and chairs. Quen, Ceri, Ivy, Jenks, Keasley, and even the tall freak of nature, Jonathan. The surprised on their face was obvious, though Quen and Ivy had stood in a protective stand, ready for a fight, before they made out that it was Trent and I, and not someone else. When they finally realise it was only us, relief was written on their faces. and After relief came a warm welcome. But i didn't feel the warmth. I felt out of place, strange and lost. As if i was watching it from an outsiders point of view. I was aware that despite differences here they stood all worrying together. Some part of me, was glad to see them. the part of me that could feel anything at all.

I saw Quen, throw his arms around Trent and grab him into a hug. Trent hugged him back, and some distant part of me thought it was funny to see Trent hug someone. I felt Ivy move close to me and automatically i took a step back and flinched. I hated myself for doing that again and this time to Ivy, but i just couldn't help myself. If someone touched me they could hurt me. I knew that nobody here would hurt me with the exception of Jonathan and maybe Trent. But i learned long ago that knowing and feeling and two different things. Mind and soul are two different entities.  
"Rachel...hun...-" And this time i crossed the space between Ivy and I and hugged her. I held on tight and she held me tight. She put her chin on top of my head, and wrapped her arms around me. She was Ivy, she loved me. She was safety. She was a harbor to this world. She was home.

JEnks now flew in the air, his little pixy self inches from my face. I could see the worry look in his tiny face. His wings battered fast also reflecting his anxiety.

"Hey, Jenks, How's Matalina?" My voice was low. I made an effort, to sound normal for their sakes. I knew it'll be long time since i could feel normal again but they were worried enough already. I didn't want to add to that.

I could hear Trent, talking to Jonathan and Quen, their voices low and a bit muffled. It was hard to try to catch what they were saying and i made no effort to try to understand. I didn't care.

"She's doing okay Rache...Tink's panties Rache we thought you were going to die...I am so glad your here..." He paused and then added to lighten the mood. "You can pay your part of the rent now."

"Yes sir." I said and smiled.

I pulled away from Ivy. I needed sometime alone. Reunions can be painful. "You guys i am gonna go shower and change, I don't think Alistair's choice of wardrobe does anything for me." I smiled at them.

"Yeah go do that, Well be right here." I knew that somehow Ivy sensed that i wasn't truly myself at this moment. Her words came out with no strain or worries, soft and nice. But i could see that her brown eyes shone with worry. I could see that she was afraid of what had happened to me. That made two of us, I was terrified.

I began walking out of the living room, but then remembered that it was Trent after all who had...rescued me, or at least tries to.

"Trent," I looked at him and it seemed that he was already looking at me. "Thank you for trying. If you want me to do a run for you just...call me or something."

Trent stood there stunned. It seemed like he didn't know what to say. For that matter everybody looked kind of stunned, as if i had just grown a second head, and for all i knew maybe i had. I took one last look at him standing in my living room next to Quen and Jonathan, and now his expression grew irritated and angry. His bright green eyes stood out against his bruised face and his wispy hair. And i thought once again that even with the bruises on his cheek, his jaw, even with the busted lip he looked beautiful. Dear god. He'd taken a smut for me.

I turned and my way towards the bathroom.

And when i got there i breathed. I could fall apart and nobody would have to know. I turned on the shower head, and threw the robes on the floor, a distant part of me thought it was strange to be wearing underwear or something close to it. What did demons care about flashing.

Naked i stood under the shower, letting the freezing water fall over me. My breath hitched and i gasped for breath but i didn't use any hot water. The cold water helped me think, it washed away the fog from my mind. And as the fog of the last weeks or rather decades faded i became angry. My anger grew by the second. Good. Anger was better than being fearful and broken. Anger was going to help me. In my anger i put my hand over my mouth and screamed. My scream was muffled by my hand and the running water covered the sound. The sound sounded wild, something that shouldn't come out of a human. And perhaps i felt like an animal. A beaten cornered animal who was about to fight back. I screamed until my throat felt raw and my body felt week. And when i finally felt exhausted i sat in the bathtub with my knees to my chin letting the freezing water wash away everything I've been deprived of.

* * *

"Morgan, Just the person i was looking for." I looked up from my coffee. To watch a tall woman with long brown and golden skin walk up to me and sit on the chair in front of me. I knew her eyes, brown but not dull more like the color of Autumn leaves. I silently cursed myself for not paying more attention to my surroundings, sure this coffee-shop was a safe place and sure my back was to the wall but that wasn't everything that keeps you safe.

"Riley?" I genuinely smiled at her.

"The one and only Rache. How's life treating you?...Last time i saw you was on TV and you were being manhandled by a demon." Riley was also a witch. She and I had gone to school together what seemed like a lifetime away.

"Last time i saw you your ass was getting hauled to jail, for...what was it by the way, punching an officer, trying to kill your history professor...?" Seeing Riley again was distracting me. Just what i needed, a distraction from my current life problems. Riley reminds me somewhat of myself, even though we look nothing alike we have similar personalities, impulsive, hardheaded among other things. And like me she was also a runner.

"All of the above." She smiled like she was proud of it. Showing all her strong white teeth. "I have a business proposition for you. I've been looking for someone i could trust, and when i saw you here i think your the best for it."

I raised my eyebrow at her waiting to see what mess she's gotten herself into this time.

"Oh don't worry, this is quite easy."

"Right" I laughed, her ideas of easy were different from the rest of the world.

"My contractor is absolutely sure that Trenton Kalamack-" I pride myself in saying i did not twitch or flinch at his name, though my body wanted to. "-is not what he appears to be. You see,-" I could already see the excitement building in her eyes as she told me about it. "-He's been doing research on Kalamack for a long time,...many in the magical community know Kalamack is not as human or as...nice as he portrays, and my contractor,- Thomas Jones, is his name, he knows what Kalamack is Rachel. He has proof as to what Kalamack is and he has dirt on him." She smiled at me, beaming.

"What type of dirt?"

"Kalamack is dealing with brimstone and there are many...fallen lives at his feet. Thomas has proof about Kalamack's dealings but the last thing he needs is proof of what he really is....He wants to expose him, all one big bang and bring him down."

"Riley, i don't think messing with Trent is a good idea." God knows hell probably kill her for trying to uncover what he is. I wonder why he didn't kill this Jones guy already.

"Your on first name basis with him." This time she raised an eyebrow, mocking my earlier gesture. "Do you know what he is?"

"No, I don't and i recommend you don't try to find out either."

"Why not?" Because he will probably kill you and your body will never be found again. That is what i wanted to tell her but of course i didn't. So this was what it was like when people tried to convince me not to do something. I knew that because Riley was so much like me she was probably going to do it anyways.

"Why do it?" I reverse the question.

"Wouldn't you like to be part of the end of that bastard? find out what he is? if you don't already know of course...I've heard your very personal with Kalamack."

"Riles..."

"You were close and personal with him, weren't you?"

"No"

"It'll be easier if you were. Getting in would be simple for you," One of our differences is that she'll use anything or anyone to get what she wanted.

"What's the pay?"

"Nice Rachel, Real nice. What do you say?"

The first thing that came to my head was no, but after a few seconds i thought about it. I knew she saw it in my face when i finally decided. I decided to do something about it. Not to infiltrate Trent's compounds and find the proof she needed to the answer i already knew. but rather to break into Thomas Jone's home and find the evidence he held of Trent's dealings. I was going to find what Thomas Jones has on Trent and steal it. Then i was going to Trent and throwing it in his face. Tell him that i saved his secrets from exposure and that i by giving him this proof against him, instead of turning him in myself i considered myself even with him. I owed him nothing.

"Na Riles, I am leaving Kalamack alone, i have enough on my plate as it is already."

* * *

I set the large manila envelope on the passenger seat as i got into my car and started the engine. It contained basically everything that Jones had on Trent. Murders that were link to the elf and his people, connections of brimstone suppliers, pictures of Trent. I came to the conclusion that Jones was obsessed with Trent.

I'll give you a cliff note version of what i did today. Or what I've been doing in the last week.

In the last days I did extensive research on Thomas Jones. Turns out he was not a witch as i initially thought for some reason. He was actually a human with a vendetta against Trent. Reason being, i have no idea. But he was a hell of a crazie. He had a criminal record a mile long that included rape, and murder attempt, among other things. I wonder why he's running around free.

Besides my research I've been watching him, disguised in charms as a plain Jane brunette. I found his address in the local telephone book, he lived in a small one story house in a lonely broken-down neighborhood. Which was for the best. Easier to look through. I wrote down his routines, leaving for work around 10, which was a sacrifice for me becuase it's too early, and coming back around 5:40. The fact that the crazie worked everyday gave me a hell of an opportunity. So today after he left for work, I waited a while until i made sure he wasn't coming back. I parked my car a few blocks away and walked to his house. I stepped around the back and broke in. Simple as that. And finding what he had against Trent was just as easy.

As soon as i stepped inside his place i saw that this man had no life. The place was dark, desolated and simply depressing. As if nobody really lived there. I quickly opened door and found his bedroom and also found a room that was locked. I broke the lock and an office..well sort of was what the room was. An office from an obsessive physco. Walls covered in newspaper clippings, and pictures of Trent and articles. Maps with the location of what i presumed to be murders. I quickly scanned the articles. But they were only articles and they said nothing, they held no evidence.

I started searching the room. I couldn't find anything, and i leaned my hand against the wall and luckily the place i leaned in was hollow. When i pressed my hand, my hand went through and i realized there was a hole behind the papers. I quickly took the papers off and BINGO. There was a large manila envelope. I picked it up and it weighted as much as your average textbook. I quickly opened it and inside i found murders that were linked to Trent with arguments that made a lot of sense. This man had acquire the proof that i needed to turn Trent in. He had evidence about the were killings, evidence that i had no idea how he got, only that it seem as if maybe he was following Trent and main players in Trent's business like Jon. Inside there was also disks with labels such as brimstone, Angel-virus, Non-human family trees, among others. He had time-lines of everything from the turn, to the ever after. I wondered how he got his hands on those.

As simple as i got there i got out. Made my way to my car. Settled the envelope on the passenger's seat. Turned the car engine and made drove towards Trent's compounds, taking off all the disguise charms i had use along the way.

* * *

I parked my car where i wanted to in his parking lot. Well to be exact i choose a place that in case i had to run out of here i could reach my car quickly. I made my way inside ignoring all the "Maim you can't be here" an the "You need an appointment" or "Let me communicate to Mr Kalamack your here." I answered them all, with I have information for him and I'll be quick about it.

Before i got to Trent's office, i was intercepted by Jon. The tall ass freak.

"Jon dear, i have something for Trent that's going to make him happy?" I looked up at him. Have i ever mentioned how much i hate looking up at him.

"I don't think your services as a whore are required Ms. Morgan." The bastard looked at me like an insect. Then again i do wonder if that's the only way he could possibly look at me.

"Ha, you wish."

"No i don't. What i do wish for is for you to have dies as a mink, or drown, or killed by your demon...Anything but you here." He actually snarled.

"Ah-ha, just move out of my way. I got something for your Sa'han." I didn't wait for him to actually move. I pushed him out of the way. He didn't fall, but he did move. I could feel his eyes burning in holes into the back of my skull. But i simply didn't care.

I opened the door to Trent's office. Trent was sitting behind his desk. His gold wire rimmed glasses on. He wasn't wearing the jacket to his suit, it was draped in back of his chair. His shirt was a pale blue and his tie was a deep gray that matched his suit. His hair was carefully combed. He was the image of perfection.

He didn't look up as i came in. He looked deeply concentrated in his work. I could see the form of his body toned arms beneath his shirt, his broad shoulders, the contours of his chest. And automatically i thought of how they felt. And that brought back things better left forgotten.

"Hello, Rachel." He said. His voice beautiful. I didn't want to think about him. It still hurts. I still hurt for him. He finally looked up from his work. He put it inside a folder and set it aside. He took off his adorable glasses and set them on top of the folder.

I didn't say anything as i stood in front of his desk and put the large envelope in front of him.

He lifted both his eyebrows in a questioning gesture but he took the envelope from i layed it and opened it. Taking it's content out and laying them on his desk. As he did this i spoke.

"Thomas Jones. I believe this is everything he had on you. I thank you for taking a demon smut for me, but i never asked for your help. Whatever alternative motive you had for helping me you can just forget it. We are even now. I owe you nothing." I started to walk away.

"Alternative motive?" He said. He was leaning back in his chair. "Is that why you think i helped you?" There was a tightness around his eyes. The only thing that showed that i had hit a nerve. When i didn't answer his question he continued. I thought the question was rhetorical. "How about I wanted you safe?"

A snort escaped me before i answered. "Come on Kalamack, there are no reporters, no one, you are trying to impress here. It's only you and i. And I know much better than to believe you did it out of the kindness of your heart." I smiled bitterly at him. My words were cold and brutal, just how i felt inside.

He stood up then and walked towards me. He stood in front of me. His body inches from mine. When his mouth opened to form words i beat him to it.

"As much as I'd like to stay and argue the moral ethicals that you _don't_ have, i have things to do." His eyes tighten at my comment. Old habits die hard. Old habits with new bitterness are worse. I turned around to finally leave. But he wouldn't let me. He quickly walked in front of me, and blocked my path. Damn elf quickness.

"You've been broken witch. What exactly did the demon did to you, huh?...Played with you, whipped you, what has gotten my witch so bitter." His voice was mocking. He had such a bitterness himself in his voice. He seemed angry and underneath it all he also seemed, worried?

"Murdering bastard." I snarled the words.

"Back to familiar territories."

"Move."

"How are you faring?" He lifted a thin pale eyebrow. I wanted to hit him. I wanted to wipe that mocking smile from his face. I was so angry. But not only at him.

"Trenton, move."

"Tell me Rachel?"

"It's none of your damn business how i am doing." I said through clenched teeth.

"I am...curious."

Of course. He wants to know everything. Curious. That hurt a bit. And i could see the satisfaction in his eyes because he knew i was going to take the bait and tell him. I think he planned it since he blocked my way and put on that mocking mask of his.

"Curious? you really want to know." My words were clipped by my anger. But perhaps i needed to release the anger i was feeling inside. I needed it to move on with my life. To let go of everything that's killing me.

"I want to know what really is bothering you. I am observant Rachel." I Tried unsuccessfully to move around him.

"DAMN IT TO THE TURN TRENT!! LET ME LEAVE."

"No." He crossed his arms over his chest. To my defense the actions i choose next he simply deserved.

"Fine." I punched him in the face. Hey i am good at that so i did so. I landed a punch on his beautiful cheek. His head turned but otherwise he stayed just as he was. "You have no right, to ask me anything."

"I do. Tell me what happened Rachel. What did he do to you."

I hit him again. In his face, in his chest. I hit him many times, but before he did anything. I knew that my punches were not strong today. I was drained and not because of being...trapped a few weeks ago, but because i was carrying such an emotional baggage. And it was killing me inside.

After five or six punches i was too tired to throw another one he grabbed my wrists and pulled me to him. I struggled against him, I struggled with everything that was left in me. Pushing him away, tearing myself away from his warm chest and his fragrant smell. I didn't realize when the tears started streaming down my face but now the were. He held me tight to him. One arm around my waist and the other to the back of my head. He was holding me as if i was a child.

I was no longer struggling against him. Perhaps i needed this. I needed to be held and feel safe. But this was Trent we were talking about. I tried to convince myself he wasn't safe, but my heart felt otherwise.

"I am so sorry." I could hear agony in his smooth low voice. "I am so sorry."

"He tortured me, for so long...And i fought against it, i fought for so long, but then i couldn't fight anymore. I couldn't-" My voice was a low whisper broken by sobs. "I am angry Trent, I am pist-off, at everything and everyone, at you, at Al, at newt, at Kisten for dieing, at Jenks because of his short lifespan, but above all at _myself_...for not being able to save them, for not being able to save myself. For not being good enough."

He moved away from me enough to see my face, to move my face close to his. And thought the tears he kissed me.

"Your only one person. There are things you will never be able to change." His words could've hurt if it wasn't for the sad and wise tone he had picked up. And he kissed me again.

And to only remember how _alive_ in his arm. That he filled me with love before everything ended. I kissed him back. I took his face in both of my hands and kissed him reliving everything that was once beautiful with him. I then stepped away from him. Because i knew he didn't feel the same way.

"I know you don't feel anything for me. Thank you anyways." I thanked him because finally getting the anger out of me was leaving me light and liberated. I fell like i could breathe again. Even if it's only temporary.

He crossed the space between us and kissed me again. He held me tight to him. Every line of his body against mine. And between the kiss he said something that might have been "I feel _everything_ for you." But because hope is cruel god, i decided to ignore what i thought i heard.

"Come on." He said as he took my hand and started pulling me out of his office. Seeing the familiar corridors i knew where he was taking me. To his rooms. To the place i haven't been in, in so long. And because i needed this, i needed to be held and loved i went with him. Along the way i saw Jonathan glare at me, i ignored him.

Trent's bedroom went along with him. It was large, larger than my living room and bedroom put together. The bed was also extremely large and by experience i knew it was as comfortable as it looked. The furniture was a deep mahogany and the drapery and sheets were white and green. Tapestries decorated his walls. Simply Beautiful.

He closed the door and pushed me against it. My I was trapped between him and the door, nowhere to run. But i didn't want to run. He kissed me fiercely and i kissed him just the same. Our bodies knew this dance more than our mind. When the passion is right, instinct just takes over, there's no need for thoughts or words or instructions, the heart knows when it feels right and the body automatically follows the heart.

That's exactly what happened. His soft lips against mine were exquisite, full filling. They filled the hole in me. He pushed back a bit and looked at me in the eyes. His green eyes were bright with lust, his cheeks were flushed and his hair was starting to come undone. He was so beautiful. The beautiful that makes your heart weep because inside you know that it could never be. I knew that this would not be more than another moment, another...mistake. Because afterward we were probably going to be back on old terms. One against the other.

He broke the stare when his lips came down on mine once again, with the same hunger and intensity as our first night together in that hotel room. The savageness was there, the primal instinct. His hands held me tight, bordering on pain, but i didn't complain. His hands traced my stomach, my ribs, mines stayed on his hair, pulling him to me, as if there was any inch of space between us. He lifted me and my legs wrapped around his waist.

He layed me on his bed. His fingers working on taking off my clothes, while his lips were still on mine. He broke the kiss once to say "A little help here." His voice husky and low. Then my hands started working on taking his clothes off. Taking off his tie, Unbuttoning his shirt, unzipping his pants. We didn't stop until every last piece of confining clothes was gone, until he and i were completely naked and our skin were aligned. And when he entered me i felt like i found myself. My back arch to him, my hands held tight to his back. His hands were on my thighs, on my hips guiding me to him.

I rolled us so that now i was on top of him, taking control of something. I haven't felt in control in a very long time. My hips moved in rhythm to his body....We were one again. I was myself again, if only temporarily...

* * *

I could hear Trent's deep breathing next to me. I had my back to him, he was laying on his back and my head was on his right arm. His right hand and my left hand were tangled in each other, my finders through his. I tensed as i came to realize that Trent and I had been together. Again. I tensed to think of what he would say this time to get rid of me.

And because i was feeling more like myself, and less like the hollow shell that returned from the dead, i let go of his hand and made a motion to sit up. I heard Trent's breathing become less deeper, and his body took the animation of waking up. I sat up.

"Why are you leaving?" His voice still had the huskiness of sleep in it.

I looked at him over my shoulder. He was leaning on his elbows. His pale hair wild and free, brow furrowed. His lightly golden body was beautiful. His muscles well carved and toned. A random thought occurred to me; his body looked a lot like the

Discobolus of Myron. I small smile crept to my lips.

"I am leaving before you get the idea that i already had my use and throw me out." I threw a smile over my shoulders to him.

Before i stood up he was at my back. He pushed my hair over one my shoulders. Exposing my neck and shoulders. He kissed the nape of my neck and then my shoulder. I turned my face to the shoulder he kissed and looked at him. He then landed a kiss on my lips. A small chaste kiss that held such tenderness i had to look down to avoid looking at him. I didn't want to misunderstand the look in his face. I didn't want to hope.

"I am sorry." He said.

"Me too." I tried to stand up but his hands were still around me.

"You misunderstand me. I am sorry about...what i said to you."

"Don't be, it was for the best you bastard." I let the bitterness seep into my voice.

"No...I...I didn't want to...but i had to, I-"

"Thanks that makes it all feel better." I said sarcastically.

"Would you listen to me, woman! I am trying to tell you something and your not making it any easier." He let go of me. I turned around enough to look at him, i brought my legs up, put my knees up and my elbows on my knees. I knew that by doing this i was covering myself...somewhat. I looked at him. He had settled crossed legged. His blanket over his legs. I lifted my eyebrow at him.

"I...had to end it Rachel, because you and I could never be...but...but then i started thinking, i started realizing that i...missed you...i wanted to feel your body against mine,...i wanted to wrap my arms around you... I have never yearned for a person like i do for you...Damn it to the turn" He runs his hand through his hair. "I, It doesn't matter that your a witch and i am an an...elf...I don't care about that...i...i love you Rachel." He whispered the last part. "I am sorry about what i said, it was cruel, i am sorry Rachel. I love you."

"What?" Now i was confused. I don't know understand what's going on.

"I love you." He said again.

I laughed humorlessly and then stopped. "If you want me to work for you just say it Trenton, so i can tell you to go turn yourself. But _don't _lie to me. I know better."

"I am not lying." I could see the tightness in his eyes.

"Uh huh. And I am not a witch."

"ARGHH!!!" He looked like he wanted to pull his hair out, he let go of his straight business man face and took on the face of someone his age. I pushed Trent's buttons. That was something I was good at. "I tell you that i love you, and there you sit laughing at me! What is wrong with you?"

"No, You lie to me! what is wrong with _you_?"

"I. AM. NOT. LYING." He was angry. He moved closer to me, his face close to mine.

"Says you, the murdering bastard." I felt tears prickling in my eyes. But i refused to cry in front of him. I looked away from him.

He murmured something that sounded like "Damn witch."

He grabbed by face roughly with both his hands. And turn me to forcibly look at him. And to my embarrassment and annoyance i tears had spilled down my face. And to not show him i was crying i didn't wipe them off. But he saw them now. A worried look had taken his features. I looked down. Trying to avoid his eyes. I put my hand to his chest trying to push him away. Instead i became distracted by the warm skin underneath my hand and the heartbeat i felt.

"Look at me." He said. "Rachel, Look at me." Unable to avoid him i looked up at him.

"I am not lying. I love you."

"I don't want to believe that." I whispered.

"Why not?" He had a confused look on his face now. He was clueless. Damn, Stupid, elf.

"Because, Trent, hope is a cruel god. I don't want to get hurt by you again." Admitting that hurt more than i cared for. Laying a weakness for him to see, was a difficult thing to do.

"Give me a second chance. I've never felt like this before, not for anyone...Let me show you how much i love you. Don't take that away from me."

He had settled close to me. He slipped his arms around my waist, again. And i turned to meet his embrace. I buried my head under his chin. Is breathed him, leaves, and cinnamon. I felt safe with him. God help me, despite everything i felt a safety with him that was different. In our embrace our bodies melted together. Fitting each other perfectly.

"Please." His breath ruffled my hair.

"I don't know." I really didn't know.

"Please." He said once again. Maybe it was the please that did it, or maybe the fact that he was naked. I learned long ago that i can't stay angry at a man wearing nothing but his underwear, never-less a naked one.

"Okay." That came out of my mouth before i had time to think it over.

"I love you, Rachel."

I didn't say anything because i wasn't ready to give him another part of me. Yet.

_The end!!! I hope you guys enjoyed it!! : ) Later. _


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